Misc-Reports

Wrong As Can Be

2012-02-09T11:04:00.000-05:00

Famous predictions that have turned out to very, very wrong.

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"Man will never reach the moon regardless of all future scientific advances."

-- Dr. Lee DeForest, "Father of Radio & Grandfather of Television."

"The bomb will never go off. I speak as an expert in explosives."
- - Admiral William Leahy , US Atomic Bomb Project

"There is no likelihood man can ever tap the power of the atom."
-- Robert Millikan, Nobel Prize in Physics, 1923

"Computers in the future may weigh no more than 1.5 tons."
-- Popular Mechanics, forecasting the relentless march of science, 1949

"I think there is a world market for maybe five computers."
-- Thomas Watson, chairman of IBM, 1943

"I have traveled the length and breadth of this country and talked with the best people, and I can assure you that data processing is a fad that won't last out the year."
--The editor in charge of business books for Prentice Hall, 1957

"But what is it good for?"
-- Engineer at the Advanced Computing Systems Division of IBM, 1968, commenting on the microchip.

"640K ought to be enough for anybody."
-- Bill Gates, 1981

"This 'telephone'has too many shortcomings to be seriously considered as a means of communication. The device is inherently of no value to us,"
-- Western Union internal memo, 1876.

"The wireless music box has no imaginable commercial value. Who would pay for a message sent to nobody in particular?"
-- David Sarnoff's associates in response to his urgings for investment in the radio in the 1920s.

"The concept is interesting and well-formed, but in order to earn better than a 'C,' the idea must be feasible,"
-- A Yale University management professor in response to Fred Smith's paper proposing reliable overnight delivery service. (Smith went on to found Federal Express Corp.)

"I'm just glad it'll be Clark Gable who's falling on his face and not Gary Cooper,"
--Gary Cooper on his decision not to take the leading role in "Gone With The Wind."

"A cookie store is a bad idea. Besides, the market research reports say America likes crispy cookies, not soft and chewy cookies like you make,"
-- Response to Debbi Fields' idea of starting Mrs. Fields' Cookies.

"We don't like their sound, and guitar music is on the way out,"
-- Decca Recording Co. rejecting the Beatles, 1962.

"Heavier-than-air flying machines are impossible,"
-- Lord Kelvin, president, Royal Society, 1895.

"If I had thought about it, I wouldn't have done the experiment.
The literature was full of examples that said you can't do this,"
- - Spencer Silver on the work that led to the unique adhesives for 3-M "Post-It" Notepads.

"Drill for oil? You mean drill into the ground to try and find oil? You're crazy,"
-- Drillers who Edwin L. Drake tried to enlist to his project to drill for oil in 1859.

"Stocks have reached what looks like a permanently high plateau."
-- Irving Fisher, Professor of Economics, Yale University , 1929.

"Airplanes are interesting toys but of no military value,"
-- Marechal Ferdinand Foch, Professor of Strategy, Ecole Superieure de Guerre , France .

"Everything that can be invented has been invented,"
-- Charles H. Duell, Commissioner, US Office of Patents, 1899.

"The super computer is technologically impossible. It would take all of the water that flows over Niagara Falls to cool the heat generated by the number of vacuum tubes required."
-- Professor of Electrical Engineering, New York University

"I don't know what use any one could find for a machine that would make copies of documents. It certainly couldn't be a feasible business by itself."
-- the head of IBM, refusing to back the idea, forcing the inventor to found Xerox.

"Louis Pasteur's theory of germs is ridiculous fiction."
-- Pierre Pachet, Professor of Physiology at Toulouse , 1872

"The abdomen, the chest, and the brain will forever be shut from the intrusion of the wise and humane surgeon,"
-- Sir John Eric Ericksen, British surgeon, appointed Surgeon-Extraordinary to Queen Victoria 1873.

And last but not least...

"There is no reason anyone would want a computer in their home."
-- Ken Olson, president, chairman and founder of Digital Equipment Corp., 1977

Particularly interesting is the quote from Bill Gates.

Here’s a man who was dead wrong. But he learned from his mistake and, in fact, built a career based on that fact.

Would that other leaders had that grace.

2011-10-03T11:01:00.000-04:00

Bob Dylan In Plagiarism Row Over Paintings.

Ode to Dylan
New Positively 4th Street

You got a lotta nerve
To say I copied anybody
When I was drawing
You just stood there grinning

You got a lotta nerve
To say you I'm another Richard Prince
You just want to be on
The side that's winning

You say I let you down
I'm just a plagiarist MoFo
If you're so hurt
Why then don't not go to my show.

http://www.guardian.co.uk/music/2011/sep/28/bob-dylan-paintings?INTCMP=SRCH

Ghostbusters Firehouse On The Chopping Block

2011-06-21T18:47:00.000-04:00

20 firehouses in New York City are threatened with closings.

One of the most well known is the Ghostbusters firehouse that serves lower Manhattan.

Local officials have led numerous protests before June 3. But on that day there was a protest march led by the firefighters themselves and their unions.

With each closing the chance of someone in the city losing their life because of delay in fighting a fire will increase.

Some have suggested that Mayor Bloomberg could save some of the firehouses by minimizing the number of private contracts for jobs that city workers could do for a lower cost.

But as of today it seems that the Stay Puft man will have to go and smile no more.

Nightline Wins-Late Night Ratings Battle

2011-06-06T13:48:00.000-04:00

Nightline Scores a First in Late-Night Ratings Battle

ABC's "Nightline" has achieved a milestone in the late-night ratings, B&C reported. For the first time, "Nightline" ended the 2010-11 broadcast season as the highest-rated late-night show.

It is the first time ever that the program placed first and beat CBS's "Late Show With David Letterman" and NBC's "Tonight Show With Jay Leno" in both adult demographic segments -- adults 25 to 54 years old and adults 18 to 49, the story says.

For the 2010-11 broadcast season, ABC News’ “Nightline” ranked No. 1 across all key demos:

NightLIne - ABC

Total Viewers - 4.023 million -- Adults 25-54 1.649 million -- Adults 18-49 1.277 million

Late Show - CBS

Total Viewers - 3,489,000 million -- Adults 25-54 -1,548 million -- Adults 18-49 1,151 million,

Tonight Show - NBC

Total Viewers - 3,874,000 million -- Adults 25-54 -1,596 million -- Adults 18-49 1,274 million,

according to Nielsen Media Research

For more information:

http://www.broadcastingcable.com/article/469169-_Nightline_Tops_Broadcast_Season_For_First_Time.php

http://blogs.abcnews.com/pressroom/2011/06/ratings-report-for-abc-news-nightline-for-week-of-may-23-2011.html

Rare Sexy Gucci Timepieces Catalog

2011-06-02T19:04:00.000-04:00

I have no history on this catalog which is post 1997 but not current.

16 full color pages and price list still included in the back folder.

This catalog is not cited on google. It is like Gucci has forgotten about this item.

Idle Thoughts

2011-05-21T13:24:00.000-04:00

I planted some bird seed.

A bird came up.

Now I don't know what to feed it

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I had amnesia once

---or twice

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The easiest way to find something

lost around the house

is to buy a replacement.

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Life is sexually transmitted.

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I went to San Francisco.

I found someone's heart.

Now what?

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Protons have mass?

I didn't even know

they were Catholic.

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All I ask

is a chance to prove that money

can't make me happy.

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How is it one careless match can start a forest fire, but it takes a

whole box to start a campfire?

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Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet Soup?

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If the world were a logical place,

men would be the ones

who ride horses sidesaddle.

********************

What is a "free" gift?

Aren't all gifts free?

********************

They told me I was gullible

and I believed them.

********************

Teach a child to be polite and courteous

in the home and, when he grows up,

he'll never be able to merge

his car onto the freeway.

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Experience is the thing you have left

when everything else is gone.

********************

My weight is perfect for my height

--which varies.

********************

I used to be indecisive.

Now I'm not sure.

********************

All of us could take a lesson

from the weather.

It pays no attention

to criticism.

********************

How can there be

self-help "groups"?

********************

If swimming is so good for your figure,

how do you explain whales?

********************

Show me a man with both feet firmly on the ground,

and I'll show you a man who can't get his pants off

*******************

Is it me --

or do buffalo wings

taste like chicken?

********************

Top Twenty Celebrities for 2011

2011-05-19T11:20:00.000-04:00

Forbes has released it's top 100 most influential celebrities in America for 2011.

This year Lady Gaga has overtaken Oprah Winfrey as Number One.

For the complete 100 list with all the standings go to: http://www.forbes.com/wealth/celebrities#p_2_s_arank_

Top 20

1 Lady Gaga

2 Oprah Winfrey

3 Justin Bieber

4 U2

5 Elton John

6 Tiger Woods

7 Taylor Swift

8 Bon Jovi

9 Simon Cowell

10 LeBron James

11 Angelina Jolie

12 Katy Perry

13 Johnny Depp

14 Kobe Bryant

15 Leonardo Dicaprio

16 Black Eyed Peas

17 Donald Trump

18 Dr. Phil Mcgraw

19 Tyler Perry

20 Paul McCartney

Top 10 Richest Celebrities as Ranked by Forbes

1 Oprah Winfrey $290M

2 U2 $195M

3 Tyler Perry $130M

4 Bon Jovi $125M

5 Jerry Bruckheimer$113M

6 Steven Spielberg $107M

7 Elton John $100M

8 Simon Cowell $90M

9 Lady Gaga $90M

10 James Patterson $84M

Gasoline Coupons

2011-04-19T11:26:00.005-04:00

Overlooked Gas Coupons

I didn't realize it, but these coupons are good for one gallon of gas at most retailers.

I have seen them around, but until recently never took advantage of them, I never realized their actual worth.

You probably have one or two just lying around somewhere.

Now is the time to use them before they lose their value, and it's too late!!

SEE COUPON BELOW...

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2011-04-15T13:48:00.000-04:00

Hong Kong Debuts its First 3D Erotic Film

Reuters – Japanese adult actress Saori Hara is interviewed during the making of "3D Sex and Zen" at a …

By Stefanie McIntyre and James Pomfret – Thu Apr 14, 2:17 pm ET

HONG KONG (Reuters) – A period drama about a young man, a duke and royal orgies drew hundreds in Hong Kong to the premiere of the territory's first 3D erotic film earlier this week.

The soft-porn "Sex & Zen: Extreme Ecstasy" debuts as the stricken porn industry turns to 3D as a potential money-spinner to revive its fortunes following the success of Hollywood blockbusters such as "Avatar."

"What we're going to expect is that people don't take it as an erotic or any gross thing to look at," said director Christopher Sun.

"Try to take it as an entertaining movie for adults."

His father, Stephen Shiu, was responsible for the original "Sex and Zen," a 1991 film that grossed over US$2.6 million and held the crown as the city's highest-grossing adult film for over a decade.

http://news.yahoo.com/s/nm/20110414/od_nm/us_hongkong_porn

Taming Chaos with a Personal Plan | STRATFOR

2011-03-18T10:31:00.001-04:00

Taming Chaos with a Personal Plan | STRATFOR

Taming Chaos with a Personal Plan
March 16, 2011 | 1805 GMT

By Scott Stewart
Over the past week we’ve seen a massive earthquake and tsunami in Japan that caused a nuclear accident, the Saudis sending troops into Bahrain to quell civil unrest there and the government of Yemen taking measures to expel foreign media as protests have swelled against Yemeni President Ali Abdullah Saleh.
We have also recently seen large-scale evacuations of expatriates from Tunisia, Egypt and Libya, and it is not unreasonable to assume that we might see a similar exodus from Bahrain and Yemen if developments in those countries deteriorate. Moreover, in Japan, the risk of radiation and conditions that are not yet under control at the Fukushima Daiichi nuclear power plant could force further evacuations there.
In light of this uncertain environment, STRATFOR thought it prudent to address once again the topic of personal contingency planning. Indeed, we also made this topic the subject of this week’s Above the Tearline video. While we have often discussed this topic in relation to terrorist attacks, its principles are also readily applicable to crises caused by natural disaster, war and civil unrest. When a crisis erupts, having an established personal contingency plan provides people with a head start and a set of tools that can help them avoid, or at least mitigate, the effects of the chaos and panic that accompany crisis events.
When Chaos Reigns
When a crisis erupts due to civil unrest, natural disaster or a major terrorist attack, a number of things happen rapidly and sometimes simultaneously. First, panic ensues as people attempt to flee the immediate scene of the disaster, usually seeking safety using the same escape routes. At the same time, police, fire and emergency medical units all attempt to respond to the scene, so there can be terrible traffic and pedestrian crowd-control problems. In the event of large civil disturbances, roads can also be clogged with protesters, troops and panicked civilians. This can be magnified by smoke and fire, which can reduce visibility, affect breathing and increase panic.
In many instances, an attack or natural disaster will cause damage to electrical lines, or the electricity will be cut off as a precautionary measure. Natural gas, water and sewer lines can be damaged, causing leaks, and in the case of natural gas lines raising the threat of explosions and fire.
Earthquakes and mudslides can cut roads and shut down mass transit. Often, people find themselves trapped in subway tunnels or in high-rise buildings, and they are sometimes forced to escape through smoke-filled tunnels or stairwells. Depending on the incident, bridges, tunnels, subway lines and airports can be closed or jammed to a standstill. Grocery stores are frequently inundated by people scrambling (and sometimes fighting) to obtain food and supplies.
In the midst of this confusion and panic, telephone and cell-phone usage soars. Even if the main trunk lines and cell towers are not damaged by the event or otherwise affected by the loss of electricity, this huge spike in activity quickly overloads the exchanges and cell networks. This means the ripples of chaos and disruption roll outward from the scene of the crisis as people outside the immediate vicinity of the crisis zone hear about the situation via the media and wonder what has become of loved ones who were in or near the crisis zone.
The Need to Plan
Those caught in close proximity to such a disaster site have the best chance of escaping and reconnecting with loved ones if they have a personal contingency plan. While such planning is critically important for people who live and work overseas in high-threat locations, recent events have demonstrated that even people residing in places considered safe, like Cairo and Tokyo, can be caught in the vortex of a crisis. Taking this one step further, sudden disasters, such as tornadoes, earthquakes, school shootings or the derailment of train cars carrying chlorine, can strike almost anywhere. This means that everyone should have a personal contingency plan.
Emergency plans are vital not only for corporations and for schools but also for families and individuals. Such plans should be in place for each regular location — home, work and school — that an individual frequents and should cover what that person will do and where he or she will go should an evacuation be necessary. This means establishing meeting points for family members who might be split up — and backup points in case the first or second point also is affected by the disaster.
When school-aged children are involved, parents need to take the time to coordinate with the school to learn what the school’s crisis plans are so any measures the school employs can be accounted for during the planning process. A crisis plan should also account for any pets a family may have.
The lack of ability to communicate with loved ones because of circuit overload or other phone-service problems can greatly enhance the sense of panic during a crisis — especially in this age, when people are so dependent on almost-constant communications via the ubiquitous smart phone.
Perhaps one of the foremost benefits of having personal and family contingency plans in place is the reduction of stress that results from not being able to contact a loved one immediately. Knowing that everyone is following the plan frees each person to concentrate on the more pressing challenges presented by their personal evacuation. This is critical because someone who waits until he or she has contacted all loved ones before evacuating might not make it out.
It also is important to have a communications plan, which should include the contact information for the designated rallying site as well as an alternate communications hub outside of the area. It might be difficult to communicate from point A to point B, but someone at point A or B might be able to get through to a person at point C. For example, it may be impossible to call from Tripoli to New York, but both parties may be able to call through to Rome.
Alternative means of communication also should be included in the communications plan. If the phone lines and cell phones are clogged, many times text messages can still get through and Internet connections may work to send e-mail. Satellite telephones, though expensive, are also very useful in a communications blackout, as are two-way radios. Analog fax lines can also prove useful when other forms of communication are shut down.
People who are going to serve as communications hubs need to be briefed on the evacuation plan and have contact information (landline and cell phone numbers, e-mail addresses, etc.) for each person who will be participating in the evacuation. The communications hub should also be provided with important personal data on each person, including full name, date of birth, passport numbers, etc. The communications plan also will be helpful in case one member of the family is unable to evacuate immediately or finds it unwise to evacuate at all. In that case, he or she will know where the rest of the family is going and how to contact them once communications are restored.
Planning is important because, when confronted with a dire situation, many people simply do not know what to do or where to start. It is not unusual to find people wandering aimlessly at the scene of a disaster. Not having determined their options in advance — and in state of shock over the events of the day — people quite often find themselves unable to think clearly enough to establish a logical plan, so they just drift around or collapse in helplessness. Having a plan in place gives even a person who is in shock or denial and unable to think clearly a framework to lean on and a path to follow.
Evacuating
One of the keys to surviving a catastrophe is situational awareness. Situational awareness allows people to recognize a potential threat at an early stage and take measures to avoid it. Situational awareness also helps people know where to go when an unforeseen disaster strikes. For example, if the airport is closed by the crisis, situational awareness enables one to understand the alternate means of leaving the country, and if a bridge is damaged on an alternative land route, you can locate another way out. Being aware of the layouts of your residence and workplace is also critical. If an office building is hit by an incident of workplace violence or catches fire, people with a plan will know where the fire exits are and where they lead. Situational awareness will then help them realize when an exit could lead them out of the frying pan and into the fire.
Situational awareness also aids in reacting to a dangerous situation while on the move. If a subway tunnel is filling with smoke from a fire or bombing, situational awareness tells one to keep low in order to avoid being overcome by smoke. Better still, proper preparation can lead people to carry important items such as a smoke hood that can be worn to protect against smoke and a flashlight to help navigate a dark place like a tunnel.
For individuals who work in high-rise buildings, frequently travel or routinely take a commuter train or subway, these two items can greatly assist you if the need to evacuate arises. Smoke hoods are relatively inexpensive devices that can be carried in a briefcase or purse and quickly donned in case of emergency. They will usually provide around 20 to 30 minutes of breathing time, which could quite literally mean the difference between life and death in a smoke-filled hallway, stairway or subway tunnel. Likewise, a small flashlight could prove to be invaluable in a crisis situation at night or when the power goes out in a large building or subway. Some of the small aluminum flashlights can also double as a handy self-defense weapon.
Of course, in some situations, evacuation might not be the best idea. If there is no immediate threat at a specific location, it may be more dangerous to join a crowd of panicked people on the street. In some cases, it might be safest to just stay in place and wait for order to return — especially if the shelter is stocked with food, water and other basic necessities. Situational awareness will allow you to make the call on whether to stay or go.
As part of a contingency plan, it is also prudent to prepare a small “fly-away” kit containing clothes, water, a first-aid kit, nutritional bars, medications and toiletry items for each member of the family. It also is a good idea to include a battery-powered or crank-powered radio and other items such as appropriate maps, multi-tool knives and duct tape. An appropriate amount of cash can also prove quite useful. The kit should be kept in a convenient place, ready to grab on the way out. Even if it is impractical to keep all these items in constant readiness, keeping most of them together and using a prepared list to collect the other items quickly can help get one out the door in seconds. Maintaining important papers, such as vehicle titles, deeds, licenses, birth certificates, passports and credit card information, in a central file allows it to be quickly retrieved in case of an evacuation. Of course, passports are of vital importance in an overseas situation.
Another important part of situational awareness is having the means to receive instructions and information from the authorities. In addition to radio and television, many locations have emergency text and e-mail alert systems that can provide critical information. Overseas, embassies also maintain networks for disseminating information to expatriates such as the U.S. Department of State’s warden system. Individuals should register for such services and ensure they know how information is disseminated before the crisis hits and results in communication disruptions.
When it comes to information pertaining to emergency plans and fly-away kits, the U.S. Federal Emergency Management Administration’s ready.gov site is an excellent resource. For people residing overseas, the U.S. Department of State’s travel information site and the Overseas Security Advisory Council are also valuable resources filled with helpful information.
Now, while it is important to listen to authorities in the case of an emergency, individuals cannot rely on the government to take care of them in every situation because the resources simply may not be available. This means that individuals must have a plan in place designed to take care of themselves and their families.
Flexibility Required
In order to be effective, an emergency plan must be fluid and flexible. It is important to recognize that even a good plan can be worthless if reactive measures taken by authorities during an emergency impede execution of the plan, or if the catastrophe itself closes down the airport or a section of a primary escape route. For these reasons, it is best to have several alternate contingency plans that account for multiple scenarios and include various routes and modes of evacuation. Once the emergency is announced, it likely is too late to start devising a back-up plan.
Plans must be also reviewed periodically, at least once a year. A plan made following 9/11 might no longer be valid. Bridges and roads included in the original plan might be closed for construction at the present time or could have been changed to a one-way traffic pattern. Communication plans may also need to be updated if family members move or change telephone numbers.
The contents of fly-away kits should be checked periodically to ensure the kits are functional. Flashlight and radio batteries can lose their charge and need to be replaced. Items such as smoke hoods can become damaged by being carried around in a purse or briefcase for too many years. Food can become stale and inedible. Medications can expire. Children can grow and require different sizes of clothing.
Finally, while having a contingency plan on paper is better than having nothing, those plans that are tested in the real world prove to be far superior to plans that are never tested. Running through an evacuation plan (especially during a high-traffic time such as rush hour) will help to identify weaknesses that will not appear on paper. It also will help ensure that all those involved know what they are supposed to do and where they are supposed to go. A plan is of limited use if half of the people it is designed for do not understand their respective roles and responsibilities.
No plan is perfect, and chances are that individuals will find themselves “shifting on the fly” as conditions on the ground change in the event of an actual emergency. However, having a plan and being prepared allows a person to be more focused and less panicked and confused than those who have left their fate to chance.
Reprinting or republication of this report on websites is authorized by prominently displaying the following sentence, including the hyperlink to STRATFOR, at the beginning or end of the report.
"Taming Chaos with a Personal Plan is republished with permission of STRATFOR."

Get Internet Access When Your Government Shuts It Down

2011-02-02T15:21:00.004-05:00

Here is an important set of tools for anyone living is an area where the government shuts down internet service.

As world wide web users, you already know how much you use the internet for all manner of functions.

Some of these methods were used in Egypt. If you have friends in volatile areas pass this on.

http://www.pcworld.com/article/218155/get_internet_access_when_your_government_shuts_it_down.html

The Lady That Fell Into a Fountain While Texting

2011-01-21T13:21:00.001-05:00

Make the World Safe for Texters!

On ABC’s “Good Morning America” this morning, George Stephanopoulos spoke to the woman who fell into a mall fountain while she was texting. Accompanied by her attorney, she said she intends to hold all guilty parties responsible.

Turns out that at the time this woman did her face-plant, she was under investigation for charging $5,000 on a coworker's credit card. Dunk her again!

http://blogs.abcnews.com/george/2011/01/texting-fountain-ladys-viral-video-the-story-behind-it.html

Even Then BP Knew

2010-06-02T12:06:00.004-04:00

HOLY CLAIRVOYENT COPYWRITER BATMAN!!!

Actual BP Ad from 1999

So You Like Flying?

2010-03-24T14:34:00.015-04:00

Up In The Air Or Not

*************************************

Continental Airlines

Continental Airlines has become the last of the big U.S. carriers to offer free meals for coach passengers.

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Airline Announcements United Flight Attendant announced, 'People, people we're not picking out furniture here, find a seat and get in it!

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On landing, the stewardess said, 'Please be sure to take all of your belongings. If you're going to leave anything, please make sure it's something we'd like to have.

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'There may be 50 ways to leave your lover, but there are only 4 ways out of this airplane'

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Another flight attendant's comment on a less than perfect landing: 'We ask you to please remain seated as Captain Kangaroo bounces us to the terminal.'

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An airline pilot wrote that on this particular flight he had hammered his ship into the runway really hard. The airline had a policy which required the first officer to stand at the door while the passengers exited, smile, and give them a 'Thanks for flying our airline.

' He said that, in light of his bad landing, he had a hard time looking the passengers in the eye, thinking that someone would have a smart comment.

Finally everyone had gotten off except for a little old lady walking with a cane.

She said, 'Sir, do you mind if I ask you a question?' 'Why, no, Ma'am,' said the pilot. 'What is it?' The little old lady said, 'Did we land, or were we shot down?'

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As the plane landed and was coming to a stop at Ronald Reagan, a lone voice came over the loudspeaker: 'Whoa, big fella, WHOA!'

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After a particularly rough landing during thunderstorms in Memphis, a flight attendant on a Northwest flight announced, 'Please take care when opening the overhead compartments because sure as hell everything has shifted after a landing like that.'

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Overheard on an American Airlines flight into Amarillo , Texas on a particularly windy and bumpy day: During the final approach, the Captain was really having to fight it.
After an extremely hard landing, the Flight Attendant said, 'Ladies and Gentlemen, welcome to Amarillo . Please remain in your seats with your seat belts fastened while the Captain taxis what's left of our airplane to the gate!'

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'Your seat cushions can be used for flotation; and, in the event of an emergency water landing, please paddle to shore and take them with our compliments.'

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As you exit the plane, make sure to gather all of your belongings. Anything left behind will be distributed evenly among the flight attendants. Please do not leave children or spouses......except for that gentleman over there.'

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After a real crusher of a landing in Phoenix , the attendant came on with, 'Ladies and Gentlemen, please remain in your seats until Capt. Crash and the Crew have brought the aircraft to a screeching halt against the gate.

And, once the tire smoke has cleared and the warning bells are silenced, we'll open the door and you can pick your way through the wreckage to the terminal..'

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The U.S. Department of Transportation’s Bureau of Transportation Statistics released the following air travel 2009 facts:
*) 703.9 million travelers
*) U.S. airlines flew 6.6% fewer domestic and international flights than in 2008
*) U.S. flights were on average 80.4% full system wide
*) Airlines expected to lose $2.8 billion in 2010.

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Part of a flight attendant's arrival announcement: 'We'd like to thank you folks for flying with us today. And, the next time you get the insane urge to go blasting through the skies in a pressurized metal tube, we hope you'll think of US Airways.'

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Time-Shifted TV Shows Update

2009-12-17T12:08:00.002-05:00

The 11 most time-shifted TV shows, through Nov. 2009

Source: Advertising Age

	PROGRAM	# OF PEOPLE^*
1	Fox's "House"	5,038,000
2	ABC's "Grey's Anatomy"	4,968,000
3	NBC's "The Office"	3,810,000
4	CBS's "NCIS"	3,588,000
5	CBS's "The Mentalist"	3,577,000
6	ABC's "V"	3,566,000
7	ABC's "Deperate Housewives"	3,355,000
8	CBS's "The Big Bang Theory"	3,219,000
9	CBS's "Survivor: Samoa"	3,112,000
10	ABC's "FlashForward"	3,098,000
11	CBS's "Criminal Minds"	3,075,000

The Yankees Other Paper Parade

2009-11-17T12:29:00.012-05:00

The New York Yankees won the 2009 World Series in 4 out of 6 games, which was a minor sweep of the Philadelphia.

On November 6, 2009 a Ticker Tape parade was thrown to honor their 27th World Series victory with speeches and award ceremonies at City Hall, but afterwards, like the end of any great party, there comes the clean-up.

Cleaning up after a party is hard to do unless you are New York City.

The parade and clean up cost about $340, 000 with most of that money donated from private sources.

Found during the big clean-up parade of the confetti debris was some medical records, financial statements and court records.

Some critics, who did not seem to live in New York City, said it would take weeks to clean up the paper. It was gone within hours.

It was a great up-lift for a financially stressed city. And next year? Go Mets!

Worst EPA Green Ad to Date

2009-10-01T12:07:00.003-04:00

Nothing Says Green, Clean and Radon Free
Like Covering Your Stinky Feet With Green Socks.

Estelle Getty's Emmy Auctioned Off On eBay

2009-09-22T10:00:00.004-04:00

TV Academy Angry

Variety reports the Academy of Television Arts & Sciences wants Estelle Getty’s 1987 Emmy for supporting comedy actress for her work in "The Golden Girls" removed from sale on eBay.

The statuette is being offered by a seller of fine art, with an initial asking price of $15,000. As of Tuesday afternoon, Sept. 22, 2009, there were no bids.

THE WEEK WITHOUT A MONDAY 9/11

2009-09-11T21:11:00.000-04:00

A 9/11 retrospective, written on 9/17/01

9/10-16/2001
8 Blocks from Ground Zero
Barbara Fultz Martinez

People start things on Monday, set them going, especially in New York City in September when everyone is revving back into high gear. But Monday, September 10, 2001, is a lost day on the New York calendar.

Again and again, this week you heard, "on Monday, ... the first plane... the second plane... on Monday, the first tower... the second tower... on Monday...the Pentagon...on Monday... 4 planes hijacked...on Monday...8 planes...on Monday..." Only it was Tuesday, the first day of this week, and the first day of tomorrow. People kept saying "on Monday..."

We live 8 blocks from where the World Trade Center was. I always said "6 blocks"... when you live near something that big it seems very close. I had to count the blocks on the map on Sunday to be certain how many it really was. It was our back yard, over by the river, next to the parks and the Financial Center marina and Battery Park City, actually 3-4 blocks from our 4 schools and our Little League / Soccer League ball park.

Tuesday, I was in my office in Long Island (the other side of Queens); Lionel was at the loft. We phoned back and forth many times. My nephews phoned and sent emails. I sent emails; he sent emails. We never lost touch. TV never stopped transmitting; radios never went silent. Subways never stopped entirely; they just lost their southern stops in Manhattan. Metro North and LIRR worked outbound till evening, then inbound came back. The LIRR started up inbound service to Penn Station at 5:00 pm.

Power went out at 39 Worth in the afternoon when 7 WTC fell. Our ATT local and long distance service at home never failed.

But without power, no answering machine.

Tuesday I got to our nephew, Stephen's uptown apartment on West 56 Street by 6:30. No delays; no crowds at Penn Station. Subway north, no crowd, no delay. Rush hour. Empty somber streets. People had already moved themselves
out.

Lionel fielded phone calls all afternoon at the loft, then hiked to 14th Street, with clothes and toothbrushes and a stock of face masks, and took the A train; he arrived about 9:30, shoulders sagging, somber. Stephen brought us a pizza. We didn't talk much. When I couldn't understand words spoken on TV anymore I fell into a daze. Steve didn't want to watch TV. Lionel stared at it.

We slept at Steve's Wednesday and Thursday and went to work every day, like most New Yorkers who didn't have offices downtown but, like everybody, we didn't concentrate very well and kept wandering off to watch or listen to the news.

The hand shape formed by the spines from the top of one of the towers resting on Church Street is burned into my memory like a memorial sculpture.

All week, people kept saying we must not do to "them" what we did to the Japanese Americans in WWII. Then, "They"... at war against "them" whoever, wherever "they" are. On Sunday they said "the people on the front lines are diplomats & spies."

We felt better when Rudy Giuliani came on TV; he made us feel like "us" in NY City; he did it magnificently simply and well. He was real in helping us express and surround our losses, our uniformed police and firemen and all those missing thousands who used to work every day in the Twin Towers, and, potentially, all those who poured in to help.

The NYC Office of Emergency Management was awesome in deploying the
rescue effort. It was not chaotic even if it was hectic and heroic in
proportions. I had never imagined what my city had prepared for.

Wednesday and Thursday the list grew of other buildings our neighborhood may lose, "stable" for the moment because they won't fall on the rescue workers but likely slated to be pulled out of the skyline too... the other WTC buildings, one a temporary morgue when it fell, the Millennium Hotel, the Marriott Hotel, and at least one of the big pinkish buildings with the sky-reflecting windows at the World Financial Center, several little buildings, Dave's Cookies.... You still cannot separate fact and rumor.

It felt very personal: Our neighborhood's powerful, wonderful, flashy back yard over by the marina was irrevocably destroyed, a gaping smile in the waterfront skyline. In the words of a neighbor: "every time you turned the corner it was always there. You always looked up. You wanted to see what the weather would be." The towers were our weathervane. You could tell by how high or close the fog or mist or clouds clung whether things would dissipate or last for hours.

We do live here, even if we couldn't say anything because what are buildings compared to thousands of lives? We were embarrassed to mourn architecture in the face of so much human tragedy, to mourn our neighborhood.

With the collapse of 7 WTC on Tuesday and damage to Verizon, email transmissions from my office failed but I didn't know till the next day. Local ISPs like AIM's i-2000 lost routes through main regional servers, and access priority went to the feds, FEMA, CIA, FBI, National Guard anyway. The Cable & Wireless phone service from AIM got me regional NYC and Brooklyn numbers; but no incoming and no outgoing long distance. All was out all week. We didn't have to go back to the loft every night.

My friend around the corner had electricity and phones and my keys; she fed Mozart and Homer every morning. But we did go back through the perimeter every night, hoping the power might come back.

On Wednesday, Worth Street was off limits because the Millennium was falling, had fallen, might fall. The guard at Houston said, "See how far you can get." We got home. No power on Wednesday. The Con Ed worker around the corner said candlelight and wine might not be all bad.

Walking back up 6th Avenue to 14th Street for the subway, all the way from Canal to West Houston on the edge of the Village we passed two and sometimes three lanes of equipment, lined up bumper to tail pipe, huge earth movers, bulldozers, debris trucks, twice our height. Over a half mile, the news said. They couldn't go in till it was more stable. We got back uptown about 9:45 pm. I think they really started going in on Saturday.

Thursday before the President's Friday visit, all access points on Canal were assigned East/West, North/South grids. Our checkpoint at 6th Avenue was manned by at least 15 police guards. They let you in block by block; wrote your name down, examined your bags; wrote down who your escort was, and sent you to your house with an armed guard. Ours was a slightly sheepish young Police Academy recruit. The police commander at the site told one upset man he had no choice: "My jurisdiction ends here. You're going into a federal war zone."

There were dusty white dead car hulks here and there along the 4 block route to Worth Street, lying where they had been temporarily deposited, left aside waiting for the "gross" cartage, presumably of no interest to the medical examiner or the FBI and other forensic experts examining debris at Fresh Kills landfill over in Staten Island.

We came home Friday to stay, power or no power. Many of our best restaurants fed anyone and everyone. Neighbors told us that Capsuto Freres, was feeding residents as well as police and firemen. We ate there on Friday and Saturday. It was an enormous relief to sit down with other Tribecans, our neighbors. We went to the Community Meetings at 10 on Saturday morning and 4 Sunday afternoon "outside the zone" in the basketball court at 6th and Canal.

On Saturday a marching band (come from Louisiana to cheer New York up I read later) moving along Canal Street drowned out the Community Board members and elected officials that were trying to help figure out the who/where/whens of schools, of restored power, or phones, or email, or even just access for those below Chambers who were evacuated and had not been let back in at all. I typed up phone numbers after the meeting and posted them at 3 restaurants since so many people couldn't dial out or log on to anything.

Power came back on Friday at 11:30 pm as we sat slumped in front of a kerosene lamp and 10 candles watching Homer (the younger cat) trying to burn his whiskers. Mozart sat upright all week with a question on his face. Saturday we cleaned out the refrigerator and Sunday we vacuumed up the dust and washed the floors.

A big question for residents is how toxic has the waste been? We saw at least 3 "washing stations" where they hosed down cars and workers; one with a truck labeled "Lead & Asbestos Service". The community board promises an "independent" measurement by next week.

I was excited to have electricity so I could send some email. But every time I logged on to AOL: "If you want Mets Tickets or more information on Ticketron events in the metropolitan area, call 212-955-5000." All over we all got the same message for every downtown phone that didn't work.

Our neighbors in the building began to turn up. Lionel had set up phone contacts with a couple of them on Tuesday. We all seemed sort of surprised at how glad we were to see each other, and how good it felt that we were all okay. From the school yard some of our kids saw it fall down, and they saw people jumping.

It is strange to have your neighborhood occupied, to see Humvees ("Hummers" to me but Lionel says that's not accurate) all over the place, to see national guard and police everywhere. To see crews come on duty, all strong, and then go off weary to the bone and the soul. To have rescue tents and stations all over.

We met state troopers from Syracuse and firemen from Flint, Michigan; we saw one overwhelmed policeman dissolve in sobs. We heard someone in the street telling someone else, in a broad midwest drawl which I can imitate, where Renssalear, Indiana, is, "near Chicago."

But mostly we just kept out of the way. They didn't need more
volunteers; and we residents were not part of their emergency (fortunately).

We stared in shock late on Saturday night when we realized that what we saw at the end of Greenwich Street in front of the 7 WTC rubble was the 15-story WTC antenna, square in the middle of the street, standing straight up. It was gone on Sunday.

As we walked around over the weekend we saw mounds and mounds of bottled water
and packs of water bottles, especially by the rescue tents but all
over. Workers were giving us water. There were other places where food
was just dropped and abandoned because generosity had outpaced need.

By the Borough of Manhattan Community College side steps we found a mound of huge bags of dog food for the canine workers. On Sunday Franklin street was lined with boxes of new T-shirts for anyone who needed them, rescue or local. The Tribeca Tribune editor was wearing one since he hadn't any more clean clothes..

Saturday was prep day for getting the Stock Market open and Wall Street running. Little trucks were at every corner for Con-Ed, Nextel, Verizon, Sprint etc etc; big trucks rolled by with huge wheels of cable. They were re-knitting communications and laying extra lines on the ground.

Lots of buildings already had emergency and back up generators. I counted 22 "rented" portable hitch trailer generators lining Leonard Street on Sunday night between Broadway and Church, waiting for some business' power to fail on Monday, waiting for a call for help.

All week newspapers were in short demand "below the perimeter" ... Mary's Stationery is a little narrow store front on Hudson with a beat up couch, a fine espresso counter, and lots of magazines; it's an adult "hangout." Mary has a British accent and is about 4' x 5'. Sunday, Jason said the papers would be in in 10 minutes. 20 minutes later when I came back he was frantically on the cell phone: "Tell her to come back; I sent 4 customers after her, on bikes!"

Two minutes later a Con Ed truck pulled up, opened the back doors and there were at least fifty bundles of the Sunday Times. The customers unloaded and Mary showed up, beaming, 5 minutes later. I heard later that all week she had been paying someone "up north" maybe $1 a copy to deliver any copies of the daily papers they could get.

It was beautiful on Sunday. September in New York City is the best, when "you can see forever" under a brilliant clear blue sky. The winds usually blow from north to south and the air is crystal. If you look north, you can almost believe nothing has changed. But then you see the Empire State Building.

The black smoke over 7 WTC was turning white Sunday night and thinning out. You could see a ghostly outline of the altered skyline. We'll get used to it; but there will come days now and then when we will forget and be jolted into sorrow when we round the corner.

The national guard was directing traffic at Worth and Church Streets on
Sunday night. Traffic was all "official."

Tomorrow is Monday. The Stock Exchange will be open.

All rights reserved
Barbara Fultz Martinez

Photographs copyright Lionel Martinez

World Wide Top 10 Spammers 2009

2009-07-06T11:24:00.008-04:00

This TOP 10 chart of ROKSO-listed spammers is based on those Spamhaus views as the highest threat, the worst of the career spammers causing the most damage on the Internet currently. Spamhaus flags these as a priority for Law Enforcement Agencies.

1 Canadian Pharmacy United States
A long time running pharmacy spam operation. Uses botnet spam techniques to send tens-of-millions of spams per day. Probably uses many affiliates all over the world to spam but is probably based in Eastern Europe and hosts sites on botnets and on Chines

2 Leo Kuvayev / BadCow Russian Federation
Russian/American spammer. Does "OEM CD" pirated software spam, copy-cat pharmaceuticals, porn spam, porn payment collection, etc. Spams using virus-created botnets and seems to be involved in virus distribution. Partnered with Vlad - aka "Mr. Green"

3 HerbalKing India
Massive affilitiate spam program for snakeoil Body Part Enhancement scams. Also does replica luxury goods, pharma and porn. Spams via botnets, bulletproof hosting offshore and even sometimes uses fast flux hosting.

4 Vincent Chan / yoric.net Hong Kong
Vincent Chan and his Chinese partners have been sending spam for years. They mainly do pharmacy, and are able to send out huge amounts daily. The use a vast amount of compromised machines, for sending, hosting and proxy hijacking.

5 Alex Blood / Alexander Mosh / AlekseyB / Alex Polyakov Ukraine
So many Alex & Alexey spamming! Alex Blood tied to Pilot Holding & bbasafehosting.com long ago, then Alex Polyakov posted he owned them. Massive botnet and child-porn spam ring, also pharma, mortgage, and more. May work with Kuvayev and Yambo.

6 Nikhil Kumar Pragji / Dark-Mailer Australia
Through the Dark-Mailer Windows based proxy-botnet based spamware, this spammer is responsible for and behind a large portion of the world's illegally send spam.
Queensland

7 Peter Severa / Peter Levashov Russian Federation
A spamming partner of Alan Ralsky and other spam gangs.

8 Yambo Financials Ukraine
Huge spamhaus tied into distribution and billing for child, animal, and incest-porn, pirated software, and pharmaceuticals. Run their own merchant services (credit-card "collection" sites) set up as a fake "bank."

9 Ruslan Ibragimov / send-safe.com Russian Federation
Stealth spamware creator. One of the larger criminal spamming operations around. Runs a CGI mailer on machines in Russia and uses hijacked open proxies and virus infected PCs to flood the world with spam.

10 Rove Digital Estonia
Botnets, malware, spam, pharming, DDoS. Inhoster, Cernel, Esthost, Atrivo. What else needs to be said?

Find Out More About Spam:
http://www.spamhaus.org/

Typical Spammer Weekly Income:
http://www.programmerfish.com/how-much-do-spammer-make/

Spam Sent 40 million
Click through ratio 0.12%
Total Click-throughs 48,000
Click-through-to-sales ratio 1/200
Total sales 240
Total sales revenue $37,440.00
Spammer Commission rate 50% (Gah!)
Total spammer income $18,720.00
-------------------------------------------------------------
Weekly costs
Bulletproof hosting $230
4 days of botnet access $6800
Email addresses $4000
Total Costs $11,030
Net Profit $7690

Or about $350,000 per year

The Speed of Michael Jackson’s Death in the News

2009-06-28T15:00:00.003-04:00

Thursday 6/25 I was working in an independent television studio.

I was making broadcast masters for a show we regularly video record. There is a certain amount of free time while the masters are being duplicated, so I logged into my twitter account. After a few moments I began reading random tweets and saw one that said "McMahon, Fawcett and now Michael Jackson.

This was first I became aware that anything had happened to Michael Jackson. A quick glance at Google News had many stories about Michael Jackson being hospitalized for a heart attack. The time was 5:18 pm EDT.

We in the studio were discussing the possible causes for Jackson’s heart attack when I refreshed the Google page and noticed that the TMZ had announced that Michael Jackson had died. The time at this point was 5:22 pm EDT.

For the next few minutes as far as google was concerned only TMZ reported on Jackson's death.

Then websites like Newsday, and a San Antonio newspaper site reported on his death. Moments later the Washington Post was joined the death reports and there now a good chance that this was a true story.

A quick click to the Washington Post’s website was met with an system error. It seemed they were knocked out by a surge in traffic. The time now was 6:02 pm EDT.

At this point we fell back on traditional media and turned on the television. Neither CNN, MSNBC, nor Fox had reported on Michael Jackson's death. They were still carrying stories about the heart attack were still waiting for further news.

It was almost a half hour later the major media announced his death.

More Internet News Impact Stories:

Michael Jackson Dies -TMZ
http://www.tmz.com/2009/06/25/

How Michael Jackson’s death made search engines go crazy
http://www.examiner.com/x-10080-DC-EGovernment-Examiner

Michael Jackson’s death reported in near real time
http://digital.venturebeat.com/2009/06/25/

TV misses out as gossip website TMZ reports Michael Jackson's death first
http://www.latimes.com/news/local/la-me-jackson-media

Really Green -- Elephant Dung Paper

2009-04-01T14:59:00.004-04:00

WASHINGTON, Mar 27 (OneWorld.net) - Karl Wald's "waste paper" is getting some serious attention. His business, "Mr. Ellie Pooh," sells recycled paper and other products handcrafted primarily out of elephant dung by Sri Lankan artisans.

Wald's venture was voted "Green Business of the Year" by other social entrepreneurs gathered at Green America's Green Business Conference in San Francisco last year. Mr. Ellie Pooh's paper products are 100-percent recycled and made of 75-percent elephant dung and 25-percent post-consumer paper. "There are no toxic chemicals used in our paper-making process," says Wald, adding: "Mr. Ellie Pooh's papers are handmade, acid-free, and as organic as it gets."

For more info:
http://news.yahoo.com/s/oneworld/20090327/wl_oneworld/world3613051238172527
http://www.mrelliepooh.com/

http://store.mrelliepooh.com/index.html

Man wearing "I ♥ My Marriage" t-shirt busted for domestic battery

2009-03-18T10:59:00.005-04:00

Actual Police Photo

MARCH 16--A Florida man wearing an "I ♥ My Marriage" t-shirt was arrested last night for allegedly choking his wife during an argument in their Tampa-area home.

Bradley Gellert, a 32-year-old financial consultant, was busted by Hillsborough County Sheriff's Office deputies and booked into jail on a felony domestic battery by strangulation charge.

To see more "busted with t-shirts" photos go to:
http://www.thesmokinggun.com/archive/years/2009/0316093marriage1.html

Cows Automatically Point To The North

2008-10-21T10:54:00.003-04:00

Cows automatically point to the north because they have their own in-built compasses aligning them with the Earth's magnetic field, scientists have discovered.

Dr Sabine Begall and colleagues from the University of Duisburg-Essen have discovered that cows tend to point north.

The researchers studied deer in the Czech Republic and looked at thousands of images of cattle on Google Earth. The animals tended to face north when eating or resting.

"We conclude that the magnetic field is the only common and most likely factor responsible for the observed alignment," the scientists wrote in an article.

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/

Jenna Jameson Plastic News

2008-10-11T13:08:00.005-04:00

Jenna Jameson Recent Timeline

It all starts with bad plastic surgery.

Porn Star Jenna Jameson’s Botched Vagina Plastic Surgery Puts Her Out Of Work

Porn star Jenna Jameson, who has been trying to turn her best-selling book “How to Make Love Like a Porn Star” into a movie, has not been showing up to her Hollywood studio meetings because of an ill-fated vaginoplasty that has left her very unhappy with the results.

Since the vaginoplasty, the star of hundreds of x-rated flix has allegedly gone into hiding until her valuable privates heal or are re-done.

“She underwent a vaginoplasty at a Beverly Hills plastic surgeon, and she is very unhappy,” says a source close to the x-rated film star.

Celebrity Plastic Surgery by Jet H. Ross

Other Jenna news

Jenna Jameson: Weight Loss and Plastic Surgery

Really scary plasitic surgery results

“Is that Skelator? She got plastic surgery and is addicted. There is no turning back now, she is only going to get more scary.”

http://plasticsergeant.com/home/celebrity/lip/jenna-jameson

Jenna Jameson breasts are scarred from having her breast implants removed, her face looks like it collapsed, and she still has her silicone injected lips!
http://www.hotonlinenews.com/2008/0 /28/

Other web sources have Jenna’s take on her weight loss and personal problems:
http://ifitandhealthy.com/jenna-jameson-weight-loss-and-plastic-surgery/

And now she is pregnant with twins.
http://www.zimbio.com/Jenna+Jameson

Who is The Apple PC Man? Its John Hodgeman!

2008-10-04T19:15:00.006-04:00

One of Many Apple Ads http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0GWYaviIzCU&NR=1

John Kellogg Hodgman (born June 3, 1971) is an American author and humorist.

In addition to his published written work, such as The Areas of My Expertise, he is best known for his personification of a PC in Apple's "Get a Mac" advertising campaign and his correspondent work on Comedy Central’s The Daily Show with Jon Stewart.

While he plays the role of a PC in the campaign, Hodgman is actually a Mac user: "I bought the very first Mac, or convinced my father to buy it, in 1984."

Who is John Hodgeman http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kUEHUTM8uRc

John Hodgman - Pangea Day http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uyQvjE3pgQg&feature=related

Moleman Interview http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qj7PTxeUHYE

Planes Circle Isle After Controller Overslept

2008-09-30T10:02:00.003-04:00

Two airplanes due to land on the Greek island of Lesbos had to circle above the Aegean sea for more than half an hour because an air traffic controller overslept, police said Monday.

An Olympic Airlines aircraft, arriving from the Greek capital Athens, and a Slovakian Airlines plane made several failed attempts to contact control tower personnel.

"They were calling the tower to get directions, but no one would answer," a police official, who declined to be named, told Reuters. "The woman later said she overslept."

The airport's secondary control service assisted the pilots to land after they had circled for 40 minutes. Police said the controller, who was not named, would be suspended for a few days.

Jesus in the Drywall

2008-09-29T19:18:00.007-04:00

Jesus in the drywall may sound like the title of a country song but two subcontractors in Gulf Shores say that's what seems to have appeared inside a house they are working on.

Inside what will be the kitchen of a new house in Gulf Shores, Omar Craddock was just getting to work.

"We were in here doing some work. I happened to be looking around and I seen something going on that I normally wouldn't see."

An image, in the drywall. "We were working and my brother-in-law Omar said 'Hey come look at this'," says John Gissendanner. "When I first seen it," says Omar, "the first thing to come to my mind was Jesus."

Whatever it is or looks like, one thing is certain according to Gissendanner, "For drywall finishing this was a pretty exciting day."

For the full story go to:
http://www.wkrg.com/local/article/jesus_in_the_drywall/18208/

Here are other possibilities to compare the image to:

Karl Marx

Edgar Allen Poe

Thanks to gregorio aka visible0

Israeli Rabbi Says Giraffe Meat, Milk Are Kosher

2008-06-13T19:51:00.004-04:00

An Israeli rabbi has declared giraffe meat and milk to be kosher, although his pronouncement is unlikely to have observant Jews clamoring to consume the exotic products, a daily reported on Friday.

"The giraffe has all the signs of a ritually pure animal, and the milk forms curds, which strengthened that view," the mass-circulation Yediot Aharonot quoted Rabbi Shlomo Mahfoud as saying.

The rabbi based his ruling on a recent finding by researchers from Bar Ilan University who took a milk sample while treating a giraffe at Ramat Gan safari park near Tel Aviv.

Giraffe meat is also considered ritually pure because the animal has a cloven hoof and chews the cud.

Also giraffe milk forms curds as required under Jewish religious law

http://www.breitbart.com/article.php?id=080606104856.tys32p6h&show_article=1

Thanks to Visable-0

The new five dollar bill.........

2008-04-22T10:59:00.003-04:00

Soon to be a fact and not a joke

Chat & Text Messaging Abbreviations

2008-04-17T12:18:00.002-04:00

Here is a list of the common chat abbreviations used in e-mail, online chatting, online discussion forum postings, instant messaging, and in text messaging (SMS), especially between cell phone users.

AAMOF As A Matter Of Fact
AND Any Day Now
AFAIK As Far As I Know
AFK Away From the Keyboard
AISI As I See It
ASAP As Soon As Possible ASL Age, sex, location
ATSL Along The Same Line
AWGTHTGTTA Are We Going To Have To Go Through This Again?
AWHFY Are We Having Fun Yet?
AWTTW A Word To The Wise
AYOR At Your Own Risk

B4N Bye For Now
BAC Bad As*ed Chick
BAK Back At Keyboard
BBFN Bye Bye For Now
BBIAB Be Back In A Bit
BBIAF Be Back In A Few
BBL Be Back Later
BBR Burnt Beyond Repair
BC Because
BCNU Be seein’ you
BEG Big Evil Grin
BF Boy Friend
BFN Bye For Now
BFD Big Frackin Deal
BIF Before I Forget
BION Believe it or not
BOBFOC Body Off Baywatch, Face Off Crimewatch
BOHICA Bend Over, Here It Comes Again
BOT Back On Topic
BRB Be Right Back
BTAIM Be That As It May
BTHOM Beats The Hell Outta Me
BTOBD Be There Or Be Dead
BTW By The Way
BWL Bursting With Laughter
BYKT But You Knew That
BYOB Bring Your Own Bottle

C&G Chuckle and Grin
CID Crying In Disgrace
CMIIW Correct Me If I’m Wrong
CU See You
CU2 See You, Too
CUL See you later
CUL8R See You Later
CWYL Chat With You Later
CYA See Ya or Cover Your Ass

DIIK Damned If I Know.
DIKU? Do I Know You?
DILLIGAD Do I Look Like I Give A Darnn?.
DLTBBB Don't Let The Bed Bugs Bite
DIY Do It Yourself
DK Don’t Know
DTRT Do The Right Thing

EG Evil Grin
EOL End of Life
ESAD Eat Sh** And Die

F2F Face To Face
FCFS First Come, First Served
FISH First In, Still Here
FITB Fill In The Blank
FOAD F*** off and die
FOAF Friend Of A Friend
FS For Sale
FTASB Faster Than A Speeding Bullet
F2F Face to Face
FTF Face To Face
FTL Faster Than Light
FUBAR Fouled Up Beyond All Repair
FUBB Fouled Up Beyond Belief.
FUD Fear, Uncertainty and Doubt
FURTB Full Up Ready To Burst
FWIW For What It’s Worth
FYA For Your Amusement
FYI For Your Information

G Grin, or Giggle
G2G Got to Go
GA Go Ahead
GAL Get A Life
GD&R Grinning, Ducking and Running
GF Girl Friend.
GFN Gone For Now.
GIWIST Gee, I Wish I’d Said That
GJ Good Job
GLGH Good Luck and Good Hunting
GMTA Great Minds Think Alike
GOWI Get On With It
GR&D Grinning, Running and Ducking
GTFO
Get The Frack Out or Off
GTG Got To Go
GTSY Great To See You

H&K Hugs and Kisses
H4UHot For You
HAK Hugs And Kisses
HAGD Have A Great Day
HAK Hugs And Kisses
HAND Have A Nice Day
HHIS Hanging Head In Shame
HHOJ Ha Ha Only Joking
HHOK Ha Ha Only Kidding
HHTYAY Happy Holidays to You and Yours
HNY Happy New Year
HOAS Hang On A Second
HOYEW Hanging On Your Every Word
HSIK How Should I Know
HT Hi There
HBASTD Hitting Bottom And Starting To Dig
HTH Hope That Helps!

IAC In Any Case
IAE In Any Event
IANAL I Am Not A Lawyer (but) A disclaimer which is usually followed by
a legal opinion
IAW In Accordance With
IBTD I Beg To Differ
IC I See
IDK I Don't Know
IIWM If It Were Me
IJWTK I Just Want To Know
IJWTS I Just Want To Say
IKWUM I Know What You Mean
IMA I Might Add
IME In My Experience
IMHO In My Humble Opinion
IMNSHO In My Not So Humble Opinion
IMO In My Opinion
IMPOV In My Point Of View
INPO In No Particular Order
IOW In Other Words
IRL In Real Life
ISS I’m So Sure
ISSYGTI I’m So Sure You Get The Idea!
ISWYM I See What You Mean
ITFA In The Final Analysis
ITSFWI If The Shoe Fits Wear It.
IWALU I Will Always Love You
IWBNI It Would Be Nice If
IWTAAQ I Want To Ask A Question
IYFEG Insert Your Favorite Ethnic Group
IYSS If You Say So
IYSWIM If You See What I Mean

JAM Just A Minute
JAS Just A Second
JFI Just For Information
JIC Just In Case
JMO Just My Opinion
JTLYK Just To Let You Know

K Okay
KISS Keep It Simple, Stupid
KIT Keep In Touch
KMA Kiss My A**
KWIM Know What I Mean?
KYFC Keep Your Fingers Crossed

L Laugh
L8R Later
LABATYD or LAB&TYD Life's A B**ch And Then You Die
LJBF Let’s Just Be Friends
LLTA Lots and Lots of Thunderous Applause
LMAO Laughing My A** Off
LMHO Laughing My Head Off
LMS Let Me See
LOLV Lot's Of Love
LOL Laughing Out Loud
LSHMBH Laughing So Hard My Belly Hurts.
LTHTT Laughing Too Hard To Type
LTNS Long Time No See
LTNT Long Time, No Type
LTS Laughing to Self
LY Love You
LYMY Love You Miss You

MEGO My Eyes Glaze Over
MLA Multiple Letter Acronym
MOF Matter Of Fact
MOSS Member Of Same Sex
MOTAS Member Of The Appropriate Sex
MOTD Message of the day
MOTOS Member Of The Opposite Sex
MOTSS Member Of The Same Sex
MTFBWY May The Force Be With You
MYOB Mind Your Own Business

NAC Not A Clue
NAVY Never Again Voluneer Yourself.
NBD No Big Deal
NFW No Friggin' Way!
NHOH Never Heard Of Him/Her
NIH Not Invented Here
NIMBY Not In My Back Yard
NINO Nothing In, Nothing Out or No Input, No Output
NITL Not In This Lifetime
NM Never Mind
NOYB None Of Your Business
NP No Problem
NQA No Questions Asked
NTIM Not That It Matters
NTW Not To Worry
NTYMI Now That You Mention It

OATUS On A Totally Unrelated Subject
OAUS On An Unrelated Subject
OB Obligatory
OBO Or Best Offer
OBTW Oh, By The Way
OIC Oh, I See
OMG Oh My God
OMFG Oh My Fracking God
ONNA Oh No, Not Again
ONNTA Oh No, Not This Again
OO Over and Out (end of communication)
OOTC Obligatory On-Topic Comment
OTF On the Floor (laughing)
OTFL On the Floor Laughing
OTL Out To Lunch
OTOH On The Other Hand
OTOOH On The Other Other Hand
OTT Over The Top
OTTH On The Third Hand
OTTOMH Off The Top Of My Head

PABG Packing a Big Gun
PCMCIA People Can't Memorize Computer Industry Acronyms
PD Public Domain
PDS Please Don't Shout.
PITA Pain In The A**
PMBI Pardon My Butting In
PMF Pardon My French or Pure Freaking Magic.
PMFBI Pardon Me For Butting In
PMFJI Pardon Me For Jumping In
PMIGBOM Put Mind In Gear, Before Opening Mouth
PMJI Pardon My Jumping In
PNCAH Please, No Cursing Allowed Here
POC Piece Of Crap
POS Parent Over Shoulder
POS Piece of S**t
POSSLQ Person Of Opposite Sex Sharing Living Quarters
PPL People
PTMM Please Tell Me More

R U THERE? Are you there?
RAEBNC Read And Enjoyed, But No Comment
RE Hello again or In Regard To
RHIP Rank Has Its Privileges
RL Real Life
RLCO Real Life Conference
ROFL Rolling On Floor Laughing
ROFLAS Rolling On Floor Laughing And Screaming
ROFLMAO Roll On Floor Laughing My A** Off
ROTF Rolling On The Floor
ROTFL Rolling On The Floor Laughing
ROTFLMAOTID Rolling On The Floor Laughing My A** Off Till I Die
ROTFLOL Rolling On The Floor Laughing Out Loud
ROTFLOLAPMP Rolling On The Floor Laughing Out Loud And Peeing My Pants
ROTFLTIC Rolling On The Floor Laughing Till I Cry
RRQ Return Receipt Request
RSN Real Soon Now
RSVP Respondez S'il Vous Plait - please reply
RTBM Read The Bloody Manual
RTFAQ Read The Frequently Asked Questions
RTFF Read The Freaking FAQ
RTFM Read The F------ Manual
RTM Read The Manual
RTWFQ Read The Whole Friggin' Question
RYFM Read Your Friendly Manual
RYS Read Your Screen

S Smile
SAPFU Surpassing All Previous Foul Ups
SCNR Sorry, Could Not Resist
SEC Wait a second
SFLA Stupid Four Letter Acronym
SICS Sitting In Chair Snickering
SLM See Last Mail
SMOP Small Matter of Programming
SNAFU Situation Normal: All Fouled Up
SO Significant Other
SOL SH** Out Of Luck
SOS Same Old Stuff or Help!
SOW Speaking Of Which
SSDD Same Stuff Different Day
STN Spend The Night
SUFID Screwing Up Face In Disgust
SUL Snooze You Loose
SWAK Sealed With A Kiss
SWIM See What I Mean?

TAFN That’s All For Now
TAKS That's a knee slapper
TANJ There Ain’t No Justice
TANSTAAFL There Ain’t No Such Thing As A Free Lunch
TARFU Things Are Really Fouled Up
TBYB Try Before You Buy
TDM Too Darn Many
TFS Three Finger Salute (Ctl-Alt-Del).
TFTHAOT Thanks For The Help Ahead Of Time
TFTT Thanks For The Thought
TGAL Think Globally, Act Locally
THX Thanks
TIA Thanks In Advance
TIC Tongue In Cheek
TINWIS That Is Not What I Said
TNSTAAFL There's No Such Thing As A Free Lunch
TNTL Trying Not To Laugh
TNX Thanks
TNXE6 Thanks A Million
TOBAL There Oughta Be A Law.
TOBG This Oughta Be Good.
TOY Thinking Of You.
TPTB The Powers That Be
TRDMC Tears Running Down My Cheeks.
TSR Totally Stupid Rules.
TTBOMK To The Best Of My Knowledge
TTFN Ta Ta For Now
TTYL Talk To You Later
TTYT Talk To You Tomorrow.
TYCLO Turn Your CAPS LOCK Off
TYVM Thank You Very Much

UOK Are You OK?
UOM You Owe Me
UOMBT You Owe Me Big Time
UR Your, You're (You Are)

WAEF When All Else Fails
WB Welcome Back
WDYMBT What Do You Mean By That?.
WDYT What Do You Think?
WE Whatever
WIBAMU Well, I'll Be A Monkey's Uncle
WIBNI Wouldn’t It Be Nice If
WMMOWS Wash My Mouth Out With Soap
WNOHGB Where No One Has Gone Before
WOA Work Of Art
WOTAM Waste Of Time And Money
WRT With Regard To, or With Respect To
WT Without Thinking
WTB Want To Buy
WTF What The F***?
WTG Way To Go!
WTGP Want To Go Private?
WTH What the hell?
WTTM Without Thinking Too Much.
WUM Watch Your Mouth
WWJD What Would Jesus Do?
WWYD What Would You Do?
WYGISWYPF What You Get Is What You Pay For
WYM Watch Your Mouth

XOXOXO Kisses and hugs

YABA Yet Another Bloody Acronym
YAOTM Yet Another Off-Topic Message
YAUN Yet Another Unix Nerd
YGLT You're Gonna Love This
YGTI You Get The Idea?
YGWYPF You Get What You Pay For
YIU Yes, I Understand
YIWGP Yes, I Will Go Private
YKYARW You Know You're A Redneck When
YMMV Your Mileage May Vary (or your experience could be different)

Thanks to Carol S

Fake Crack Sold To Nursing Home Residents - Man Arrested

2008-04-17T11:07:00.005-04:00

I used to think there was an upper age limit for some drugs, apparently not.

A 22-year-old was arrested on Thursday after phony crack cocaine was sold to residents at a Jacksonville nursing home.

Police arrested Hillmon Arnold outside the Golden Retreat Shelter Care Center at Moncrief Road and Golfair Boulevard, according to his arrest report.

Police interviews showed that a man was selling small pieces of bread that looked like crack cocaine in Tylenol pill bottles to the clients at the center for $5, the report said.

The center was targeted because residents receive their checks the 10th of the month and he needed money to support his own drug habit, the report said.

Thanks to Visible0

Bulgarian Idol - Ken Lee

2008-04-07T10:43:00.003-04:00

Bulgarian Idol

American Idol has mutated and now is seen in one form or another around the world. And so it is not surprising that there is a show in Bulgaria.

And here is an example of Bulgarian Idol:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_RgL2MKfWTo

With the world wide connectiveness of the internet, witnessed by the fact that you may have already watched the video clip, here is the Bulgarian follow-up.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0wwyeuaP_mI&feature=related

Where Have All the Girl Scout Cookies Gone? Check eBay

2008-03-27T11:00:00.002-04:00

Billions of dollars in commerce have moved online, but the Girl Scouts of the USA still strongly discourages its scouts -- or their parents -- from selling cookies on the internet.

Auctioning cookies on eBay is not what the organization's leadership has in mind for Girl Scouts, who are supposed to learn social skills and confidence from the experience. "Everyone thinks about the cookies and the money," said Michele Riggio, a spokeswoman for the organization. "But cookies are an activity first and foremost."

Meanwhile, a number of web-savvy merchants have picked up the slack online during this cookie season. A quick search on eBay returns at least a hundred listings for Girl Scout cookies.

Some sellers claim that they're selling on behalf of their kids.

In any event, eBay merchants are addressing a huge market: the Girl Scouts of the USA sell about 200 million boxes of Girl Scout cookies every year, generating about $700 million in revenue.

And although resales are a violation of the organization's policy, the Girl Scouts has not contacted eBay or sellers about pulling down the listings.

Hani Durzy, an eBay spokesman, said: "As far as eBay is concerned, these cookies are private property. We are not going to ban people from reselling them." He added that employees in eBay's corporate offices in San Jose, Calif., were "up to their ears in cookies."

Full Story:
http://blog.wired.com/business/2008/03/ebay-sellers-pi.html

http://home.search.ebay.com/girl-scout-cookies_Cookies-Biscotti_

Thanks to Visible 0

Burglar Finds Corpse And Calls

2008-03-14T18:14:00.000-04:00

A Berlin burglar's break-in took an unexpected turn when he stumbled upon a corpse and felt compelled to call the police.

"He called to say he'd just broken into a flat and found a dead body," a spokeswoman for Berlin police said.

"He gave the address of the place and then hung up."

Officers discovered the 64-year-old resident of the flat dead in his bedroom.

The man had passed away about two weeks ago and authorities are not treating the death as suspicious.

The burglar has not been heard of since.

Local media said he fled the apartment empty-handed, but police could not confirm this

Facebook Users In Decline

2008-02-22T10:49:00.005-05:00

Figures from Nielsen Online in the United Kingdom show a 5% drop in the number of Facebook users between December and January, with a similar fall for social networking websites MySpace and Bebo.

It's the first time in 17 months that Facebook has recorded a drop, and figures in Australia show a similar pattern.

Users fell 5% to 8.5 million in January from 8.9 million in December, according to data from Nielsen Online.

This was the first drop in user numbers since July 2006 when Nielsen began compiling data on the site.

Nic Howell, deputy editor of industry magazine New Media Age, said the site was no longer as popular among its core audience of young people.

". . . when major corporations start profiles on Facebook, its brand is devalued, driving its core user base into the arms of newer and more credible alternatives," he said.

"Facebook was never going to be able to carry on growing the way it has, and a lot of people - especially those who've been using it heavily - are now starting to get Facebook fatigue," said Nielsen Online analyst Alex Burmaster.

Full Story:
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/business/7257073.stm

Responses:
http://current.com/items/88848879

Britney's Father Snatches Her Notorious Pink Wig.

2008-02-11T13:23:00.000-05:00

Britney Spears' father has confiscated her notorious pink wig in an apparent bid to straighten up her act.

Jamie Spears was seen confiscating the singer's hairpiece, which is synonymous with the singer's wild image and partying, at the weekend in LA.

This seems to be an attempt to get Britney to straighten up her act.

The bobbed wig has come to signal the onset of a depressive episode, with her ousted manager Sam Lutfi revealing last month: "When the pink wig comes on, it's getting bad."

Despite her family's best efforts, it seems her time in hospital has done little to change her chaotic lifestyle - or her dress sense.

For More Pictures and Full Story:
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/pages/live/articles/showbiz/

6 Worst Travel Agents Of 2007

2008-02-07T11:21:00.000-05:00

According to the Department of Transportation's Air Travel Consumer Report the top 6 most complained about travel agents for 2007 are:

5. (tie) Priceline.com & Cheapoair.com
4. CheapTickets.com
3. Expedia.com
2. Travelocity.com
1. Orbitz.com

Most of Orbitz's complaints dealt with problems ticketing and boarding... and of course, refunds.

The complaints listed here represent only those formally lodged with the Dept. of Transportation.

For more fun information:
http://airconsumer.ost.dot.gov/reports/index.htm

What Housing Crisis? Realtors' Ads Defy Reality

2008-02-02T13:25:00.000-05:00

Despite a Nationwide Meltdown, Industry Says Now Is the Time to Buy

SAN FRANCISCO (AdAge.com) -- The housing bubble has burst. Almost three-quarters of a million Americans are in foreclosure. The median price of a single-family home recently fell for the first time in at least 40 years, and many are predicting it'll drop further in 2008.

But none of that stopped the National Association of Realtors promulgating a $40 million ad campaign urging Americans to think of buying a house as a get-rich opportunity.

"We believe there's a psychological block" to buying a home due to negative media coverage of the subprime crisis, said Frank Sibley, senior VP-communications and conventions for the National Association of Realtors.

Ads include claims that, on average, the value of a home nearly doubles every 10 years, and 60% of the average homeowner's wealth comes from home equity.

Mory Brenner, a veteran consumer-debtor attorney who now writes
on debt issues from a consumer point of view, put it this way: "Were the ads trying to lead you down a road with blinders on? I thought so. I found it objectionable and a little offensive," he said. While without patently false statements or data, Mr. Brenner said the ads "are misleading and not especially forthright and, in a way, the way we got into this situation [the subprime-mortgage crisis] in the first place." He chided the association for not producing a campaign more befitting its station. "They're not some [real-estate agent] on the corner," he said.

Others were concerned about the premise the Realtors put forth in the ads that housing values are going up. Patrick Newport, an economist with Global Insight, an economic-forecasting firm, said: "In a lot of markets, housing prices are dropping, and in some markets -- such as Florida and California -- they are dropping a lot. If you buy a home, you take on a big risk," especially if national housing prices drop 10%, as some predict, or if you lose your job and are unable to make mortgage payments, he said. He added that in many cases, "renting may be a much better deal than buying a house."

Full Story and sample ads:
http://adage.com/article?article_id=123374

Madonna Pictured With Bruised Face

2008-01-31T00:34:00.000-05:00

Eye eye, what's going on here then? The Queen of Pop was sporting a real shiner as she left her Central London home for the gym.

Madonna's painful black eye and bruising to her cheek has set tongues wagging - no matter how hard she tried to hide it behind huge shades.

Last December rumours were rife that the Material Girl had succumbed to a nip and tuck after she left a medical centre in New York with mysterious marks on her cheeks.

She hits 50 this year — and is hating it. So are these pictures of mysterious bruises proof a desperate Madonna is trying to turn back the clock?

For Full Story and more Pictures:
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/pages/live/articles/showbiz/showbiznews.html?

The Dangers of Shopping at McDonald’s in Florida

2008-01-26T11:37:00.000-05:00

Grandmother Arrested At McDonald's Drive-Thru For Not Pulling Car Forward

CLEARWATER, Fla. -- A 75-year-old woman was arrested at a Clearwater McDonald's drive-thru, because police say she wouldn't pull her car forward.

Authorities said Jean Merola, a grandmother of eight, was arrested for disorderly conduct after she refused an officer's orders to move her car while she waited for the coffee and fries she ordered at the drive-through window.

For Full Story and Video:
http://www.local6.com/news/15098343/detail.html

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

UPDATE:
Drive through arrest may spawn lawsuit

CLEARWATER - The 75-year-old grandmother who was arrested at a McDonald's drive through for disorderly conduct has an attorney.

"There is always civil liability when someone is arrested without cause. Mrs. Merola has never been in a lawsuit is not litigious by nature," attorney Steven Andrews said.

For Full Story
http://www.myfoxtampabay.com/myfox/pages/News/Detail?
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
French Fry Grandma Says Police Report Not Accurate
Wednesday, January 23, 2008 11:01:30 AM

The 75-year-old woman charged with disorderly conduct after a spat with a Clearwater police officer has read the police report of the incident and says little in it is true.

For Full Story
http://www.cfnews13.com/News/Local/2008/1/23/

Thanks to Visible0

Sex sells - coffins!

2008-01-19T19:38:00.000-05:00

An Italian firm of undertakers has unveiled its 2008 calendar - featuring glamor models draped over its range of coffins.

The calendar shows women in sexy underwear posing with coffins which can be ordered from the Cofanifunebri undertakers in Rome.

Owber Maurizio Matteucci defended the calendar - on sale at his firm's outlets for just £7 - which has caused outrage in the Catholic country.

He said: "It is good marketing but it is also but also a way to play down such a serious subject and to smile.

"Coffins are consumer goods like any other things, so I sell in the same way as any other consumer goods are sold. The calendar is very popular."

To See All 12 Months:
http://www.cofanifunebri.com/2008-calendar.htm

Don’t Just Eat Them, Listen To Your Vegetables!

2008-01-12T02:54:00.000-05:00

Now fresh vegetables can be entertaining. The Vienna Vegetable Orchestra performs on instruments made of fresh vegetables.

The Vegetable Orchestra was founded in 1998. It consists of 11 musicians, a sound engineer and a video artist. Based in Vienna, the Vegetable Orchestra plays concerts in Europe and Asia.

From time to time workshops are given - on how to manufacture an instrument or on musical topics.

For More Information:
http://www.gemueseorchester.org/index.php?option=com_frontpage&Itemid=1

Vegetable Orchestra Video:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hpfYt7vRHuY

Thanks to visibleO

Britain Is The Fast Food King

2008-01-07T11:19:00.001-05:00

A survey of 13 countries showed that the British consume the most fast food, just ahead of Americans. The French are the least likely to eat fast foods.

The survey of 13 countries also confirmed growing concern over obesity worldwide, but noted different priorities and strategies in different parts of the world for tackling it.

"People are inherently contradictory and nowhere is it more obvious than on such a sensitive and important issue as their weight," said Steve Garton of polling body Synovate, who produced the survey jointly with the BBC.

45 percent of British citizens taking the survey agreed with the statement "I like the taste of fast food too much to give it up". Americans came in at 44 percent, and Canadians at 37 percent.

However, only 19 percent of French citizens agreed with the statement. Other low scorers included Singaporeans (25 percent) and people from Hong Kong and Romania (both at 27 percent).

Around a third of all respondents (31%) agree with the statement 'I tend to eat junk food when I am feeling down'. The most emotional eaters can be found in France (57%), the United States (48%) and the United Kingdom (44%).

For More Info:
http://www.synovate.com/knowledge/infact/issues/200801/article3.shtml?

Yuki-taro Autonomous Snowplow/Ice Pooper Robot

2008-01-05T01:07:00.000-05:00

The Japanese are well known for crafting useful robots to do the dirty work for humans who'd rather park it at home, and the Yuki-taro autonomous snowplow is just another example of machines taking care of the business people can't (or won't).

Enter Yuki-Taro, an autonomous snowplow that gathers up sidewalk snow and converts it into small, manageable ice blocks that it deposits behind itself as it goes.

That's right boys and girls -- it eats snow and poops ice.

Created by a consortium of private companies, municipal governments and university researchers, Yuki-taro is equipped with two video cameras in his "eyes" as well as a GPS tracking system to be completely self-guided.

More Info:

http://www.pinktentacle.com/2007/02/yuki-taro-autonomous-snowplow-robot/

http://highlyrecommended.blogspot.com/2007/02/yuki-taro.html

Thanks to visibleO

Christian Family Gets Wrong Gift From Santa

2007-12-28T12:00:00.000-05:00

A Sacramento family got a shocking surprise from Santa this Christmas when they discovered that a Disney Channel CD they got for their three children contained music from The Diplomats rap group album.

According to CBS 13, Jeremy Danielson played the Disney Channel Hits CD for his daughters on Xmas morning (December 25) expecting music from Hannah Montana but was treated to explicit songs containing the "F" word and the "N" word. .

“It was graphic lyrics, real explicit, just stuff you don’t want your kids to hear. We are a Christian family and we don't bring media like that into our house.” said Danielson.

Danielson says he bought the CD from Toys R Us.

Toys R Us claims that it was “the first time they have had this issue and they are only the distributor”. Disney did not return phone calls when contacted.

Full Story and video
http://cbs13.com/local/christmas.local.father.2.618344.html

Thanks to visibleO

Priests brawl at Bethlehem birthplace of Jesus

2007-12-28T01:13:00.001-05:00

Seven people were injured on Thursday when Greek Orthodox and Armenian priests came to blows in a dispute over how to clean the Church of the Nativity in Bethlehem.

Following the Christmas celebrations, Greek Orthodox priests set up ladders to clean the walls and ceilings of their part of the church, which is built over the site where Jesus Christ is believed to have been born.

But the ladders encroached on space controlled by Armenian priests, according to photographers who said angry words ensued and blows quickly followed.

For a quarter of an hour bearded and robed priests laid into each other with fists, brooms and iron rods while the photographers who had come to take pictures of the annual cleaning ceremony recorded the whole event.

A dozen unarmed Palestinian policemen were sent to try to separate the priests, but two of them were also injured in the unholy melee.

Full Story:
http://www.breitbart.com/article.php

Thanks to VisableO

MISC Reports Santa Edition

2007-12-16T15:40:00.000-05:00

!+*!+*!+*!+*!+*!+*!+*!+*!+*!+*!+*!+*!+*!+*!+*!+*!+*!+*!+*!

Santa 'sacked for saying ho, ho, ho'

A Father Christmas has hung up his Santa suit after he claiming he's been
sacked for saying "ho, ho, ho!"

John Oakes, 70, says he was fired from a department store in Cairns,
Australia, for using Santa's famous greeting and singing carols.

He claims agency employer Westaff ordered their Santas to say "ha, ha, ha"
instead of "ho, ho, ho" because "ho" is a derogatory US slang word for a
woman.

Mr Oakes told the Cairns Post: "After my shift on Monday, I got a call from
my manager telling me my services were no longer required.

"I hadn't done anything wrong so I asked her why, and she said, "You said
ho, ho, ho and that's not appropriate".

"She also said I wasn't supposed to sing, but I was only singing Jingle
Bells to get the kids to laugh for their photo. It's just ridiculous and
everything's changed because of the new rules.'"

US-based Westaff denied the words were a factor in Mr Oakes' case.

Company spokesman Bert Jansz said: "The candidate was not sacked nor was his
use of the term 'ho, ho, ho' a factor in our decision.

"The candidate's attitude was not in line with the requirements of our
client and of their customers."

!+*!+*!+*!+*!+*!+*!+*!+*!+*!+*!+*!+*!+*!+*!+*!+*!+*!+*!+*!

Santa needs a license

Angry parents in Hungary have formed an association to license local
Santas after complaining they weren't up to scratch.

The Hungarian Santa Foundation has teamed up with Santa Claus workers'
unions to create an exam with strict requirements for people who want to
work as Santas.

And they plan to take legal action against any fake Father Christmases
who try and operate without a Santa licence.

Apart from having to sit the exams - from now on every Hungarian Santa
has to be at least 5ft 7ins tall and in good physical shape.

His voice has to be low, and he has to possess good communication skills,
and he has to convince examiners he likes kids.

Foundation head Gyoergy Balint said: "If a jolly old man with a sack of
presents is found handing out presents amongst kids on the street
without a proper Santa diploma - then he will have to answer in
a court of law.

!+*!+*!+*!+*!+*!+*!+*!+*!+*!+*!+*!+*!+*!+*!+*!+*!+*!+*!+*!

Letter To Santa

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X6TGYtdGXsM

!+*!+*!+*!+*!+*!+*!+*!+*!+*!+*!+*!+*!+*!+*!+*!+*!+*!+*!+*!

Is Santa Borat's neighbor?

Santa Claus manages to stay hidden all year because he really lives in
Kazakhstan and not the North Pole, according to claims by a team
of Swedish experts.

A special team working for the Swedish logistics and consulting firm
SWECO said it had calculated that Santa's home would have to be
located in a mountain range that lay across the border between
Kazakhstan - Borat's homeland - and Kyrgyzstan to be best
located to make all his deliveries.

They said that based on the Earth's rotation and demographic data - the
Kazakhstan/Kyrgyzstan border mountain range would be the best place for
Father Christmas to set off from on Xmas Eve to deliver all his presents.

The team worked out what the best and quickest route would be - and
found that all roads led not to Rome - or the North Pole - but the remote
mountain region on the Kazakhstan border.

Anders Larsson, consultant at SWECO, said: "It might explain why he's not
seen that often the rest of the year."

!+*!+*!+*!+*!+*!+*!+*!+*!+*!+*!+*!+*!+*!+*!+*!+*!+*!+*!+*!

Santa Claus should go to the gym, kids say

SPANISH children think Santa Claus is "too fat" and should go on a diet,
and that he should ditch his sleigh for a four-wheel-drive or a motorcycle.

The opinions are based on an internet poll of 4000 children aged four to
12 by children's television channel Jetix.

It said 53 per cent of them thought Father Christmas was "too fat", and 59
per cent believed he should eat better to lose weight, or go to the gym
(19 per cent.)

Many also thought his means of transport was outdated, as a sleigh was
too slow for delivering presents.

A total of 35 per cent thought he should change it for a 4WD and
31 per cent for a motorcycle.

But they were ready to keep at least one Christmas tradition - his big red
coat.

Only 21 per cent of them would like him to come down the chimney
in a shirt and jeans.

Unverified News From The Stump

2007-12-11T11:20:00.000-05:00

Unverified News From The Stump
By Larry V raving reporter

Under pressure to explain his religious faith to the
American people, Democratic presidential candidate
Barack Obama delivered a forty-five minute speech
today discussing his belief in Oprah Winfrey.

“My religion is a personal matter to me,” Sen. Obama
told his followers. “Having said that, let me make
this clear: I have accepted Oprah as my host.”

-------------------------------------------------

Later in the day, Ms. Winfrey toured the state with
Mr. Obama and, in a stunning demonstration of her
influence, briefly caused a solar eclipse.

“Sun and moon, do my bidding!” she roared, raising her
hands above her head and delighting the crowd with the
celestial display.

-------------------------------------------------

Davis Logsdon, who studies the interrelation between
politicians, religion and talk-show hosts at the
University of Minnesota, said that Sen. Obama’s
worship of Oprah Winfrey puts him in the mainstream of
American theological belief.

“Over thirty percent of Americans currently define
themselves as Oprahists,” Mr. Logsdon said. “And that
number is higher during sweeps.”

-------------------------------------------------

Elsewhere, the CIA created more controversy today by
acknowledging that it accidentally returned several
interrogation tapes to Blockbuster.

A Jello Practical Joke

2007-12-06T10:23:00.000-05:00

Here is an odd email making the rounds. It is a call for an Christmas-time office party practical joke with phony Jell-O.

Here's a delightful treat someone once made for an office Christmas party: A gelatin mold should be made with Knox Unflavored Gelatin and red food coloring.

One would think that a flavorless food would not be at all difficult to swallow.

But believe me, from the looks of people who inserted cold masses of gelatinous glop into a mouth that was expecting sweets, the experience is unexplainably horrifying!

Some claimed to be nauseated by the feel of it; others politely swallowed.

Try this a you own risk.

Sympathy greeting cards for your friends and relatives doing hard time.

2007-12-04T10:10:00.000-05:00

Terrye Cheathem, a criminal defense lawyer and adviser to the Los
Angeles Sheriff's Department, has developed a line of greeting cards
for a Hallmark-ignored demographic: the recently incarcerated.

Amongher selections are cards reading "Sorry to hear about your arrest,"
and "Honestly, I never knew anyone who was arrested before," and,
simply, "Not You!" A remorseful correspondent could choose: "I know
that I have not visited you. But I still care about you ... When are
you getting out, anyway?"

Card sales are slow, according to an October Los Angeles Times story,
and Cheathem acknowledges that people might prefer to ignore their
connections to criminals.

The Cards:
http://www.threesquaresgreetings.com/

More Information:
http://www.latimes.com/news/printedition/

Thanks to Larry V

Big Brother Has Become George Orwell’s Neighbor

2007-11-23T11:56:00.000-05:00

The Big Brother nightmare of George Orwell's 1984 has become a reality - in the shadow of the author's former London home.

It was believed thought that a 1984 situation couldn't happen in real life because it would simply cost too much. Now computer technology is cheap and techniques for using computers to control and more importantly process CCTV images are readily available to anyone who controls the system.

It may have taken a little longer than he predicted, but Orwell's vision of a society where cameras and computers spy on every person's movements is now here.

In America, this practice is becoming widespread. Perhaps they could become known as FreedeomCams.

For More About This Story Go To:
OrwellCams

Contributed by Vonross
http://www.clubofpioneers.com/blog/blog-from-ross-von-burg/16/

Numerical List of Chat & Text Messaging Shorthand

2007-11-22T00:01:00.000-05:00

SMS language (also known as chatspeak, txt, txtspk, texting language or txt talk) is the English language slang used in mobile phone SMS.

Here is a list of just the number based codes.

.02 your (or my) two cents worth

1174 nude club

121 one to one

143 I love you

14AA41 One for All and All for One

182 I hate you

1ce once

20 location

2BCTND to be continued

2BZ4UQT Too Busy For You Cutey

2D4 to die for

2G2B4G Too Good To Be Forgotten

2G2BT Too Good To Be True

2g4u too good for you

2Ht2Hndl too hot to handle

2moro Tomorrow

2nite Tonight

2U2 To You Too

3sum threesome

404 I haven't a clue

411 info

420 marijuana

459 I love you

4COL For Crying Out Loud

4EAE For Ever And Ever

4NR Foreigner

4Q is a friendly way to say: F*** You

4yeo for your eyes only

5FS 5 Finger Salute

8 oral sex

86 out of, over, to get rid of, or kicked out

911 emergency - call me

9 parent is watching

99 parent is no longer watching

If you are just plain lazy and don’t want to learn these shorthand codes you can have transl8it convert your text into lingo or vice versa.

http://www.transl8it.com/cgi-win/index.pl?convertPL

Watermelon Carvings

2007-11-14T12:14:00.000-05:00

The Asian art of watermelon carving.

These pictures has been part of an email that has traversed the globe many times.

Originally these carvings were thought to be Chinese, but now it seems they may be Japanese.

To see more go to:
http://www.americade.info/melons.htm

Man Saved From Chimney

2007-11-05T11:09:00.000-05:00

EVANSVILLE, Ind. (AP) -- Firefighters had to tear though a wall to rescue a man who became stuck while trying to climb through a chimney into a home.

Alejandro Valencio said he was drunk when he climbed down the chimney about 3:30 a.m. Tuesday to see a woman who lived in the home.

''Everyone do stupid things sometimes when they're drunk,'' he said.

The woman, Connie Deweese, said she had known Valencio for about seven or eight months but told him to stay away. She said she locked the door to her home, but ''somehow he got to the roof.''

''I've dated a lot of psychos in my life, but nobody like that,''Deweese said.

Firefighters requested assistance from police officers after they
arrived because they said Deweese was blocking the fireplace. She
received misdemeanor citations for charges of disorderly conduct and
interfering with a firefighter.

''I told them to leave him in the chimney and let him die,'' she said.

Valencio was taken to a hospital after he was removed. He later returned to the home, where a crew from television station WEHT captured Deweese hitting him with a garbage can and pelting him with bottles.

''Get off my porch, and don't you ever come back here,'' she yelled.

Valencio said he would help pay for the damages incurred from his rescue.

For More About Chimneys
blogs.salon.com/ 0004217/2005/09/14.html

Halloween Scare From Potty Police

2007-11-01T13:31:00.001-04:00

THREE young children got a Halloween scare to remember after potty police tried to shut down their pumpkin stall because they did not have a TRADERS LICENCE.

Justin Sanford, 35, and his sons Robin, 7, Jack, 4, and Benjamin, 3, set up their stand last week on a rural road near their home in South Wiltshire to raise money to buy costumes to go trick or treating.

But they were shocked when two Police Community Support Officers pulled over and threatened them with a fine if they didn't shut up shop.

"But I couldn't believe it when I was told my kids were breaking the law by selling pumpkins without a licence."

Full Story
http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/news/article406408.ece

Photo ©Lionel Martinez

Australian Laments Ear Wax Eating Video

2007-11-01T12:37:00.000-04:00

CANBERRA, Australia - Australia's opposition leader lamented his past behavior on Wednesday, as images of him picking his ear wax in Parliament reached a growing audience via the Internet.

The embarrassing footage was captured by Parliament's official television camera at least six years ago as Kevin Rudd, then a junior Labor Party lawmaker, sat in the House Representatives listening to a colleague question a government minister.

Rudd, who is likely to become Australia's prime minister next month, is seen in the background absent-mindedly probing his left ear before apparently placing the same finger in his mouth.

Watch The Video
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_ipvdBnU8F8

The Forbes Fictional 15

2007-09-23T13:21:00.000-04:00

According to Forbes, the super-rich fascinates us all. Now they have taken fictional characters and elevated them to the status of real people.

It is a dynamic list of 15, with new entries and individual drop offs.

List Leaders (9-5-07)

1 Santa Claus
2 Oliver "Daddy" Warbucks
3 Richie Rich
4 Lex Luthor
5 C. Montgomery Burns
6 Scrooge McDuck
7 Jed Clampett
8 Bruce Wayne
9 Thurston Howell III
10 Willy Wonka 1
1 Arthur Bach 1
2 Ebenezer Scrooge
13 Lara Croft
14 Cruella De Vil
15 Lucius Malfoy

========================================

DROP OUT: Jay Gatsby
Source: Racketeering
Marital Status: Single
Hometown: West Egg, N.Y.
Bootleg kingpin found brutally murdered at his Long Island estate; story dominates New York tabloids for weeks. Born James Gatz in North Dakota; moved East; changed name.

In life, Gatsby famous for huge, P. Diddy-esque parties; home modeled after Normandy's Hotel de Ville. Shadowy fortune appears to have come entirely from racketeering. Though one associate claimed Jay "would never so much look at a friend's wife," whispers suggest otherwise. West Egg mansion taken over by the state, being turned into a public park. Member since 1925. -- Matthew Herper

http://www.forbes-fictional-rich_cx_mn_de_05fict15land.html

Vincent Van Cloth

2007-09-17T13:11:00.000-04:00

Vincent Van Cloth
By Martin Bailey

Vincent van Gogh was notorious for always being short of money and materials, and it has now been discovered that he resorted to painting on tea towels. Louis van Tilborgh, a curator at the Van Gogh Museum, found that the artist used this unorthodox material for two groups of pictures.

On 16 November 1889, Van Gogh wrote to his brother Theo from the asylum at St-Rémy, saying that he had finished his supply of canvas, and needed a further ten metres. The roll did not arrive from Paris until three weeks later.

A detailed examination of two pictures from this period has revealed that Van Gogh painted on tea towel or tablecloth material for The Large Plane Trees (Cleveland Museum of Art) and Wheatfields in a Mountainous Landscape (Kröller-Müller Museum, Otterlo).

The off-white fabric has a grid pattern of tiny red rectangles, which are just visible where the paint is thin. We can only speculate, but presumably the tea towels were from the asylum’s kitchen or refectory.

Complete Story
http://www.theartnewspaper.com/article01.asp?id=4547

The Large Plane Trees ( http://www.clevelandart.org/oci/mids...7/1947.209.jpg )

The Wheat fields in a mountainous landscape (http://www.kmm.nl/object/KM%20100.44...-berglandschap)

Hair-Raising Experience For Woman On Bus

2007-08-28T10:38:00.000-04:00

RIO DE JANEIRO (Reuters) - In a new twist in Rio de Janeiro's crime annals, scissor-wielding thieves clipped off the long, flowing locks of a 22-year-old Brazilian woman as she rode in a city bus.

"We got on at the same stop and they sat behind me," sales assistant Mirna Marchetti said. "Then all of a sudden I felt someone pulling my hair. My friend tried to help me but they just cut it off, right at the base."

The thieves also stole her handbag and her mobile phone before escaping.

Marchetti's hair was dark, straight and reached down to her waist. She said she had not cut it for four years. Police suspect the thieves hope to sell the hair to a hairdresser.

Beauty salons in Rio can charge more than 500 reais ($250) for top-quality hair extensions, salon owner Rosangela Castro said.

Muggers in crime-plagued Rio de Janeiro often target bus passengers, sometimes robbing a whole bus at gun point.

"This is a new kind of crime,' said a police officer at the station where the report was filed. "They really did mean to steal her hair.

Helpful Hints For Everyday Espionage Problems

2007-08-18T19:58:00.000-04:00

A sealed envelope - Put in the freezer for a few hours,
then slide aknife under the flap.
The envelope can then be resealed.
=============================
Permanent marker ink on slick surfaces
(like incriminating store receiptBLUE!)
-- use rubbing alcohol on paper towel.
=============================
Blood stains on clothes? Not to worry!
Just pour a little hydrogen
peroxide on a cloth and proceed
to wipe off every drop of blood.
Works every time!
=============================================
To clean those artificial flowers used to decorate your safe house, pour some salt into a paper bag and add the flowers. Shake vigorously as the salt will absorb all the dust and
dirt and leave your artificial flowers looking like new! =============================================
Cure for headaches from too much espionage tension:
Take a lime, cut it in half, and rub it on your forehead.
The throbbing will go away.

Deutsche Bank Fire At Ground Zero

2007-08-11T09:11:00.000-04:00

The former Deutsche Bank building across the street from Ground Zero caught fire on 8/18/2007. The smoke and flames ebbed and flowed for hours.

At its height it was a 7 alarm fire and it claimed the lives of two brave firefighters.

Prosecutors opened a criminal investigation into the matter as several agencies sought to deflect blame for the building's failed water supply system and the response to the fire.

Here are some pictures of the smoke, firefighters and flames early in the conflagration.

Firefighter on the east side of the building before the building became an inferno.

Gusts of wind would send smoke billowing from the building.

Firefighters attempt to fight the fire from the south side of the building. They were driven away by the heat and burst of flames.

This is where firefighters stood just20 minutes before.

This incident had an eerie déjà vu feeling of 9-11

All images copyright Lionel Martinez – All rights reserved.

HOW TO HANDLE A PROBLEM NEIGHBOR

2007-07-29T18:34:00.000-04:00

Belief In Angels Proof Against Lightning, Bullets, Bats And Banes

2007-07-29T18:00:00.000-04:00

DOVER-FOXCROFT — She’s been shot at, mugged and has had a bat tangled in her hair.

If that doesn’t make your skin crawl, Jeanne Rogers, 58, also has been struck by lightning twice, has fallen into a manhole and off a cruise ship, was nearly strangled, and she unwittingly helped Fred Rogers, the late star of Mister Rogers’ Neighborhood, get naked.

"People think I’m a little paranoid when I walk a mile to avoid a manhole or won’t walk under a ladder," Rogers said during an interview this week. "There’s so many things I won’t do because I know what can happen."

While Rogers dispels the target-on-her-back theory, she does believe she has an angel perched on her shoulder.

"I do worry. Things do happen to me even though I’m careful," she said this week, standing among an eclectic collection of new and used clothing, colorful jewelry, handbags and whimsical items in her small consignment and gift shop on River Street.

For Greater Details go to:
http://bangordailynews.com/news/t/news.aspx?articleid=150100&zoneid=500

'Blind' Man Took Over From Drunk Driver

2007-07-16T10:14:00.000-04:00

A virtually blind New Zealand man has been banned from driving after taking the wheel from a drink driver.

Te Aute Matuakore Collier, 29, from Hamilton, was guided by a drunk passenger but crashed into a wall, reports Stuff.co.nz.

Collier, who has just five per cent sight, admitted a charge of reckless driving when he appeared in the Hamilton District Court.

He had been in the back of the car when he told the driver to pull over so he could drive because both the driver and front-seat passenger were drunk.

The front-seat passenger helped steer the car and both passengers told Collier to turn into a supermarket carpark.

Collier told police he just wanted to park the vehicle and get it off the road - but he missed the entrance and hit a wall.

He was disqualified from driving for two years and ordered to pay court costs.

Paris Hilton’s Real Nose

2007-07-09T10:30:00.000-04:00

Paris Hilton didn’t always have that slim beak of a nose.

Thanks to awfulplasticsurgery.com we can compare today’s nose to a copy of her high school photo.
See more at http://www.awfulplasticsurgery.com/

Car Colors & What They Mean

2007-07-04T11:40:00.000-04:00

Some actual research in the UK matched car colors with personality traits.

But a more practical aspect is that the colors are listed here in order of accident frequency--black most often (twice the average) and cream the safest.

By the way, ever notice what color the presidential SUVs are?

Black cars denote an aggressive personality or someone who's an outsider or rebel.

Silver cars indicate someone who's cool, calm and slightly aloof.

Green cars can often be chosen by people with hysterical tendencies.

Yellow cars signify someone who is idealistic and novelty loving.

Blue cars are chosen by the more introspective, reflective and cautious driver.

Gray cars represent those who are calm, sober and dedicated to their work.

Red cars denote those who are full of zest, energy and drive and who think, move and talk quickly.

Pink cars are chosen by gentle, loving and affectionate drivers.

White cars represent status-seeking extrovert drivers.

Cream cars are the least likely to be involved in accidents and denote self-contained and controlled owners.

Mistranslations

2007-06-29T11:49:00.001-04:00

Signs from around the world written in fractured English

Hotel, Japan:
YOU ARE INVITED TO TAKE ADVANTAGE OF THE CHAMBERMAID.

In the lobby of a Moscow hotel across from a Russian Orthodox monastery:
YOU ARE WELCOME TO VISIT THE CEMETERY WHERE FAMOUS RUSSIAN AND SOVIET
COMPOSERS, ARTISTS, AND WRITERS ARE BURIED DAILY EXCEPT THURSDAY.

Hotel, Zurich:
BECAUSE OF THE IMPROPRIETY OF ENTERTAINING GUESTS OF THE
OPPOSITE SEX IN THE BEDROOM, IT IS SUGGESTED THAT THE LOBBY BE USED FOR THIS
PURPOSE.

Advertisement by a Hong Kong dentist:
TEETH EXTRACTED BY THE LATEST
METHODISTS.

A laundry in Rome:
LADIES, LEAVE YOUR CLOTHES HERE AND SPEND THE
AFTERNOON HAVING A GOOD TIME.

Bondage Couple Lose Key

2007-06-27T01:16:00.001-04:00

A German couple had to call out the fire brigade after tying each other up in chains - and then losing the key to the padlock.

Jochen Ranstett, 56 and his wife Maria, from the town of Weiden, dressed up in leathers and chained each other to their beds, but lost the key during the romp.

After hours of trying to free themselves they finally gave up and called for help on Jochen's mobile phone.

He said: "It was so embarrassing. We just wanted to try something a bit different and we ended up with this.

"I even had to be taken to hospital because my wrists had swollen so much from trying to get out of the handcuffs."

http://www.ananova.com/news/story/sm_2344515.html?menu=news.quirkies.sexlife

Things Computers can ONLY do in Movies

2007-06-18T09:50:00.000-04:00

Word processors never display a cursor.

You never have to use the space-bar when typing long sentences.

Movie characters never make typing mistakes.

All monitors display inch-high letters.

High-tech computers, such as those used by NASA, the CIA or some such governmental institution, will have easy to understand graphical interfaces.

Those that don't have graphical interfaces will have incredibly powerful text-based command shells that can correctly understand and execute commands typed in plain English.

Note: Command line interfaces will give you access to any information you want by simply typing, "ACCESS THE SECRET FILES" on any near-by keyboard.

You can also infect a computer with a destructive virus by simply typing "UPLOAD VIRUS". (See "Fortress".)

All computers are connected. You can access the information on the villain's desktop computer even if it's turned off.

Powerful computers beep whenever you press a key or the screen changes. Some computers also slow down the output on the screen so that it doesn't go faster than you can read. (Really advanced computers will also emulate the sound of a dot-matrix printer.)

All computer panels operate on thousands of volts and have explosive devices underneath their surface. Malfunctions are indicated by a bright flash of light, a puff of smoke, a shower of sparks and an explosion that causes you to jump backwards.

People typing on a computer can safely turn it off without saving the data.
A hacker is always able to break into the most sensitive computer in the world by guessing the secret password in two tries.

You may bypass "PERMISSION DENIED" message by using the "OVERRIDE" function. (See "Demolition Man".)

Computers only take 2 seconds to boot up instead of the average minutes for desktop PCs and 30 minutes or more for larger systems that can run 24 hours, 365 days a year without a reset.

Complex calculations and loading of huge amounts of data will be accomplished in under three seconds. Movie modems usually appear to transmit data at the speed of two gigabytes per second.

When the power plant/missile site/main computer overheats, all control panels will explode shortly before the entire building will.

If you display a file on the screen and someone deletes the file, it also disappears from the screen (See "Clear and Present Danger").

If a disk contains encrypted files, you are automatically asked for a password when you insert it.

Computers can interface with any other computer regardless of the manufacturer or galaxy where it originated. (See "Independence Day".)

Computer disks will work on any computer has a floppy drive and all software is usable on any platforms.

The more high-tech the equipment, the more buttons it will have (See "Aliens".)

Note: You must be highly trained to operate high-tech computers because the buttons have no labels except for the "SELF-DESTRUCT" button.

Most computers, no matter how small, have reality-defying three-dimensional active animation, photo-realistic graphics capabilities.

Laptops always have amazing real-time video phone capabilities and performance similar to a CRAY Supercomputer.

Thanks to the Vole

Fast Food Reality

2007-06-08T17:39:00.000-04:00

This is what a freshly purchased KFC Famous Bowl really looks like and it does not compare favorably to the advertisement.

It's a funny experiment from The West Virginia Surf Report. They take several ads from fast food companies such as McDonald's, KFC, Arby's, Subway, Burger King, and Wendy's and compare the pics to the actual food they went and bought. Yum!!!!!

http://www.thewvsr.com/adsvsreality.htm

American Idol with Stripes

2007-06-06T01:26:00.000-04:00

“Hello, everybody out there, have we got something for you. I’m talking about the first-ever Inmate Idle contest.”
“This is a groundbreaking opportunity, never before done in any jail, so don’t miss out. We hear you singing all the time in the pods.”
“ In your cells. In the holding tanks. Now, let’s put you in front of a microphone and on a stage.”

It would have been just another day in jail if not for the wild applause.

In the yard was a stage, a festive canopy and a 15-foot billboard with a cartoon prisoner in stripes singing into a microphone. Above it, a logo, styled after American Idol, read: “Inmate Idle Singing Con-Test.”

http://www.laweekly.com/general/features/jailhouse-rock/16256/

Contributed by Vonross
http://www.clubofpioneers.com/blog/blog-from-ross-von-burg/16/

New York News - Sustainable Swimming

2007-05-02T11:07:00.000-04:00

Have you heard dolphins are killing themselves in droves? Apparently young pilot whales also. One with the nick of Sludgie had the temerity to swim in the Gowanus Canal, New York City's aptly named lavender lake which distinguished itself from other more ordinary bodies of water by occasionally catching on fire.

Even after dredging by hazimat teams in Space suits there is likely still a high concentration of PCB's and other things there. Sludgie's swim turned into a one-way holiday, he went belly up in the Gowanus for the last time. Social services are conducting an autopsy at the New York Aquarium

On another note Mayor Bloomberg plans to reclaim the harbour's waterfront so New Yorkers can again use it for recreational swimming and beach going.

Contributed by Vonross
http://www.clubofpioneers.com/blog/blog-from-ross-von-burg/16/

Roman descendants found in China?

2007-04-06T19:13:00.000-04:00

Residents of a remote Chinese village are hoping that DNA tests will prove one of history's most unlikely legends — that they are descended from Roman legionaries lost in antiquity.

Scientists have taken blood samples from 93 people living in and around Liqian, a settlement in north-western China on the fringes of the Gobi desert, more than 200 miles from the nearest city.

They are seeking an explanation for the unusual number of local people with western characteristics — green eyes, big noses, and even blonde hair — mixed with traditional Chinese features.

"I really think we are descended from the Romans," said Song Guorong, 48, who with his wavy hair, six-foot frame and strikingly long, hooked nose stands out from his short, round-faced office colleagues.

"There are the residents with these special features, and then there are also historical records about the existence of these people long ago," he said.

http://www.china.org.cn/Beijing-Review/Beijing/BeijingReview/98Nov/bjr98-46-13.html

Woman Who Lost Her Wallet In High School Gets It Back After 60 Years

2007-04-06T19:07:00.000-04:00

CEDAR RAPIDS, Iowa - Joan Martinek Barnes never imagined she would see her wallet again after she lost it at McKinley High School 60 years ago.

But the red alligator grain wallet turned up Monday when a building engineer tracked down a broken hot water pipe. It was found on top of an air duct in a basement storage room that once housed girls lockers.

Barnes, now 75 and living in San Antonio, said her wallet was lost when her coat was stolen during the winter of 1947-48.

"I don't remember all those details," Barnes said on Tuesday. "I just remember Mr. Paxson (the principal) got the coat back. I didn't have many coats."

The wallet didn't have any cash in it when it was found, but did contain a $4 activity pass, a student ID card, and a membership card for the YMCA's teen club.

MLB Tells Teams That Baseballs Must Be Stored At A Uniform Temperature

2007-03-26T12:36:00.000-04:00

Baseballs will keep their cool this summer.

The commissioner's office is telling teams for the first time that balls must be stored at a uniform temperature after they are delivered from the manufacturer.

"The specifications that Rawlings recommends are a 70 degree (21 C) temperature and 50 per cent humidity," said baseball senior vice-president Joe Garagiola Jr.

"We have contacted all 30 of the clubs, and they have all confirmed to us that they will all be storing their baseballs in a temperature-controlled facility. We're not going to have humidors every place, but every place will be temperature controlled, and so I think there will be a very high degree of uniformity."

The decision was made following debate generated by the Colorado Rockies' use of a humidor at Coors Field. The ballpark ranked first in the major leagues in scoring in its first eight seasons, starting in 1995, but dropped to second in three of the last four years behind Arlington's Ameriquest Field (2003), Cincinnati's Great American Ball Park (2005) and Kansas City's Kauffman Stadium (2006).

Cats Strike Back

2007-03-22T11:30:00.000-04:00

Cats have struck back against Menu Foods of Canada that has been accused of selling tainted food.

Nearly 100 brands of the “cuts and gravy” style food have been recalled by Menu Foods of Canada, including popular labels sold at Wal-Mart, Kroger and other large retailers.

The real story has not been released. The Feline Safe Food Front (FSFF), armed with their human’s collected armaments,
launched a series of attacks in Canada successfully forcing the company to recall the suspect food.

“The recall is huge. It’s unprecedented. . . said Tim Hackett, who runs a small-animal clinic at Colorado State University in Fort Collins.

Priests To Purify Site After Bush Visit

2007-03-14T02:26:00.000-04:00

GUATEMALA CITY - Mayan priests will purify a sacred archaeological site to eliminate "bad spirits" after President Bush visits next week, an official with close ties to the group said Thursday.

"That a person like (Bush), with the persecution of our migrant brothers in the United States, with the wars he has provoked, is going to walk in our sacred lands, is an offense for the Mayan people and their culture," Juan Tiney, the director of a Mayan nongovernmental organization with close ties to Mayan religious and political leaders, said Thursday.

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/guatemala_bush_purification

Contributed by the videoddgrapher

I'm a .....

2007-03-12T10:38:00.000-04:00

>> Gunning for victory <<

2007-03-07T13:00:00.000-05:00

Even Dr Strangelove would be proud

Last week Abu Dhabi hosted Idex-2007 - a massive arms fair, billed as "the Middle East's premier defense exhibition and conference".

Overheard at the demonstration of a state-of-the-art American
grenade launcher/machine gun by a US army lieutenant:

"We'll totally be able to kill EVERYONE with this new gun."

More: http://www.idexuae.com
This website seems to be down for some odd reason

Contributed by Vonross
http://www.clubofpioneers.com/blog/blog-from-ross-von-burg/16/

The World Is Nutz

2007-03-03T15:52:00.000-05:00

Proof That The World Is Nuts
A email about world wide sex oddities with someone’s running commentary that is currently making the rounds.

In Lebanon, men are legally allowed to have sex with animals, but the animals must be female. Having sexual relations with a male animal is punishable by death.

(Like THAT makes sense.) *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

In Bahrain, a male doctor may legally examine a woman's genitals, but is prohibited from looking directly at them during the examination. He may only see their reflection in a mirror.

(Do they look different reversed?)
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Muslims are banned from looking at the genitals of a corpse. This also applies to undertakers. The sex organs of the deceased must be covered with a brick or piece of wood at all times.

(A brick?)
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

The penalty for masturbation in Indonesia is decapitation.

(Much worse than "going blind!")
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

There are men in Guam whose full-time job is to travel the countryside
And deflower young virgins, who pay them for the privilege of having sex for the first time.
Reason: under Guam law, it is expressly forbidden for virgins to marry.

(Let's just think for a minute; is there Any job anywhere else in the world that even comes close to this?)
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

In Hong Kong, a betrayed wife is legally allowed to kill her adulterous husband, but may only do so with her bare hands. The husband's illicit lover, on the other hand, may be killed in any manner desired.

(Ah! Justice!)
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Topless saleswomen are legal in Liverpool, England - but only in tropical fish stores.

(But of course!)
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In Cali, Colombia, a woman may only have sex with her husband, and the first time this happens, her mother must be in the room to witness the act.

(Makes one shudder at the thought.)

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In Santa Cruz, Bolivia, it is illegal for a man to have sex with a woman and her daughter at the same time.

(I presume this was a big enough problem that they had to pass this law?)
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In Maryland, it is illegal to sell condoms from vending machines with one exception: Prophylactics may be dispensed from a vending machine only "in places where alcoholic beverages are sold for consumption on the premises."

(Is this a great country or what? Well, not as great as Guam!)
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Banging your head against a wall uses 150 calories an hour.

(Who volunteers for this stuff?)
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Humans and dolphins are the only species that have sex for pleasure.

(Is that why Flipper was always smiling?)
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Officials Paint Mountain Green

2007-02-23T10:14:00.000-05:00

Local government officials in China have been criticised for spraypainting a barren mountain face green.

Laoshou mountain, near Fumin in Yunnan province, was left an eyesore by quarrying.

But instead, of re-foresting the mountainside, forestry officials hired seven workers for 45 days to spraypaint it green.

Nearby villagers have been driven from their homes by the strong smell of paint,

Some villagers speculated that Fumin County officials, whose office building faces the mountain, were trying to change the area’s feng shui — the ancient Chinese belief of harmonizing one’s physical environment for maximum health and financial benefit.

A woman who answered the phone at the Fumin County forestry department said the department was unaware of reasons behind the paint job.

"This is an order from above," she said.

China's official Xinhua News Agency estimated the cost of the paint job at 470,000 yuan ($60,000) and quoted villagers as saying that, if spent on plants and trees, the money could have restored a far greater area of barren mountain.

http://www.guardian.co.uk/china/story/0,,2012697,00.html

Contributed by the videoddgrapher